Just being me..

:: 010112

2012-01-01T10:22:00.001+08:00

Happy New Year!!!

Ok ini tidak adil, sebab masa Awal
Muharam aku tak post langsung. Padahal
kita lebih perlu melebihkan Awal Muharam, baca doa akhir dan awal tahun. Ye. Tatkala Awal Muharam saya agak tersasar dan leka dengan duniawi, maka semua amalan yg saya biasa lakukan tidak diamalkan T__T. Tiada siapa yang perlu dipersalahkan melainkan diri sendiri.

Bermuhasabah yang bukan hanya tatkala awal tahun masihi atau hijrah, malahan setiap hari dan terutama apabila diri di duga dengan kesukaran dan kesenangan..

Malam tahun baru, dengan kesakitan wanita di bahagian abdomen.. saya melihat kembali perjalanan saya sejak lahir hingga kini.. Pelbagai persoalan timbul dan perlunya diri ini menjawab persoalan tersebut. Bukan sekadar menjawab, malah perlu juga melaksanakannya agar segalanya terungkai.

Confuse enough? Biarlah saya dengan rentetan saya. 2011 has not been good for me and my family. Untuk menghadapi tahun baru yang lebih baik, kena sama2 lebih tunduk padaNya. Agar Dia sentiasa bersama kita apabila kita di dalam kesusahan... I wish to find someone that can guide me better.

Again.. happy hols and have a jolly good school days, kids! :D

:: Wacky Wednesday ::

2011-12-28T22:49:00.001+08:00

:: Home ::

2011-12-27T04:51:00.001+08:00

A house is an investment. And it can be a burden if you did not manage it well.

Berkesempatan melawat ke rumah ibuku di Setia Eco Garden. Currently nobody rent the house and I dont mind. :)

2-3 hari ini asik hujan, maka.. ada la perkara2 yang tidak diingini berlaku kat rumah itu. Hmm better report fast before the Defect Liability Period ends.

Teruk jugak esp tang bahagian siling kat
tangki.

Seminar SM/SSM

2011-12-15T10:42:00.001+08:00

Did I tell u that I am currently venturing a ladylike business..? Just attend a seminar which gave a really big impact. Sangat sangat berbaloi2... and all the positive vibe really getting into me.. weeeeLets enjoy the pix k.

..:: Hurt ::..

2011-12-15T00:42:00.001+08:00

Once more.. over and over again..

He never fails to break my heart...

And myself over and over again..

Never fails to be stronger than ever.

:)

..:: Wacky Wednesday ::..

2011-12-14T11:54:00.001+08:00

..:: Life 6 Months Ago ::..

2011-12-14T11:33:00.001+08:00

From a student to a lecturer...
From diving books for exams.. to digging questions for tutorials
From waiting for carry mark.. to endless marking of tests..
From preparing assignments to preparing papers..

Love to bits. :)

XOXXOX

..:: First attempt::..

2011-12-13T23:07:00.001+08:00

Bila dengar suaramu.. ku rasakan ada getarannya...

bluekkkk. seriusly aku nak tulis gitu? Hahahaha

I already found an application in my phone which can get an easier access to this blogging thingy. So this is my first attempt. I hope there wont be any glare spelling mistakes by using this touch screen keyboard. :D

Today"s posting, about the International Conference on Public Law by the Law Faculty, UiTM. Another first attempt for me ie to be a co-author for a paper. A good experience... for a newbie like me.

Just attended the dinner. The food was great, the show too. Karaoke session.. hmm not bad. The dance part.. err yeahhh.. Sometimes you need to have a lil bit of fun ya.. Salut! Tak terbayang beta, En Yunus berdangdut. wee~~

..:: Missing me? ::..

2011-12-10T14:29:00.000+08:00

Ya Allah dah hampir setengah tahun tak menjengah blog nih. Biar betoolllll???? Hehehe. No specific reason. :D

XOXO

..:: Of Feeling ::..

2011-06-19T02:09:00.001+08:00

"..................... crying is the only way how your eyes speak when your mouth can’t explain how things made your heart broken. #girlsdeals........"

".... walau seremuk mana hati dilukai, bentuklah ia semula dan serahkan kembali pada Yang Kuasa..."

..::From Bali with Love ::..

2011-05-22T16:17:00.001+08:00

..:: Mutiara Hati ::..

2011-04-17T23:41:00.000+08:00

Sekadar berkongsi, hasil nukilan Anis Liyana Amerrudin. *Far, adik mung ke? Deep. So deep.

Aku bukanlah seorang gadis yang cerewet dalam memilih pasangan hidup. Siapalah diriku untuk memilih permata sedangkan aku hanyalah sebutir pasir yang wujud di mana-mana.Tidak perlu kau memiliki wajah setampan Nabi Yusuf Alaihisalam, juga harta seluas perbendaharaan Nabi Sulaiman Alaihisalam, atau kekuasaan seluas kerajaan Nabi Muhammad Shallallahu ‘Alaihi Wassalam, yang mampu mendebarkan hati jutaan gadis untuk membuat aku terpikat.

Andainya kaulah jodohku yang tertulis di Lauh Mahfuz, Allah pasti akan menanamkan rasa kasih dalam hatiku juga hatimu. Itu janji Allah. Akan tetapi, selagi kita tidak diikat dengan ikatan yang sah, selagi itu jangan dibazirkan perasaan itu kerana kita masih tidak mempunyai hak untuk membuat begitu. Juga jangan melampaui batas yang telah Allah tetapkan. Aku takut perbuatan-perbuatan seperti itu akan memberi kesan yang tidak baik dalam kehidupan kita kelak.

Permintaanku tidak banyak. Cukuplah engkau menyerahkan seluruh dirimu pada mencari redha Illahi. Aku akan merasa amat bernilai andai dapat menjadi tiang penyangga ataupun sandaran perjuanganmu. Bahkan aku amat bersyukur pada Illahi kiranya akulah yang ditakdirkan meniup semangat juangmu, mengulurkan tanganku untukmu berpaut sewaktu rebah atau tersungkur di medan yang dijanjikan Allah dengan kemenangan atau syahid itu. Akan kukeringkan darah dari lukamu dengan tanganku sendiri. Itu impianku. Aku pasti berendam airmata, andainya engkau menyerahkan seluruh cintamu hanya kepadaku semata-mata.

Cukuplah kau mencintai Allah dengan sepenuh hatimu kerana dengan mencintai Allah, kau akan mencintaiku kerana-Nya. Cinta itu lebih abadi daripada cinta biasa. Moga cinta itu juga yang akan mempertemukan kita kembali di syurga. Seorang gadis yang membiarkan dirinya dikerumuni, didekati, diakrabi oleh lelaki yang bukan muhrimnya, cukuplah dengan itu hilang harga dirinya di hadapan Allah. Di hadapan Allah. Di hadapan Allah.

Yang dicari walau bukan putera raja, biarlah putera Agama. Yang diimpi, biarlah tak punya rupa, asal sedap dipandang mata. Yang dinilai, bukan sempurna sifat jasmani, asalkan sihat rohani dan hati. Yang diharap, bukan berapinya jihad pada semangat, asal perjuangannya ada matlamat. Yang datang, tak perlu rijal yang gemilang, kerana diri ini serikandi dengan silam yang penuh luka. Yang dinanti, bukan lamaran dengan permata, cukuplah akad dan janji setia. Dan yang akan terjadi, andai sama ataupun tidak dengan kehendak hati, Insya Allah ku redha kemahuan pilihan Illahi…

To err is a human. Having the same battle to improve our inner soul together and be a better servant for Him shall be a blessing. Insya Allah.

..:: Once in a blue moon ::..

2011-04-13T16:05:00.001+08:00

Now I feel like blogging. I think its because Ive just finished my first assignment for this semester and I dont feel like stopping. *to write. Let me just bla bla bla here ok. Finished my first assignment, and 4 more to go. Yerp.. the usual me having panick syndrome to finish up my work, and also the usual last minute of having it assgned to me. Due date will be on the day the final starts. So my dear taikor, please be very extra careful to me, because a slight mistake, will make me bark so loud that will tear up your smallest skeletons in ur ear. *exaggerate*

In few weeks time, Ill finish my LLM. I will become an academician. What to expect? What NOT to expect? Oh...tetiba stress. Lebih menyayat hati bila mengenangkan diri ini dan juga seorang lagi sahabat dengan berat hati terpaksa membatalkan tiket ke Jepun pada 12 April yang lalu.

We actually wanted to go badly, to the extend wouldnt care of any risk, and especially when our bestie did not give any cue to cancel or postpone. But one fine day, when the radiation gets worst, the day when I am supposed to submit all the completed forms and what not to Mulia for visa thingy, Shaf tweeted and advised us to cancel the ticket. The situation gets worst especially the scarcity of electricity and clean water.

If only we are allowed to bring gallons of water, we will of course proceed with our trip. But, thinking that we will have to share with the locals to get clean water if we arrive there, and also had to face the radiation aftermath, we dare not to continue our berani-mati intention. Finally cancelled the tiket, had a full credit shell from Air Asia and dengan pantas juga telah membooking untuk ke tempat yang lain. Yang pasti, masih tetap penduduk yang mata sepet. *ce teka ce teka. Hihi.

http://topgelato.com/wp-content/uploads/japan-aftermath-0314014.jpg

Though we had the purest intention to help the Japanese, but I guess our arrival will only give them extra burden. Takpe lah, there are other mediums to help kan? My prayers to all the Japanese and also to those who live there, hopefully things will get better. Oh, dan pembatalan trip ini juga ada hikmahnya, ie at least I can concentrate more on my finals. Lepas final, memang aku huyah huyeh 2 minggu. Bahahahaha *gelak orang kaya*.

Mantra for the month : Finale, Finale, Finale...

..::Am I In Love? ::..

2011-03-05T19:34:00.000+08:00

SEDETIK LEBIH - Anuar Zain (Ciptaan :Edry Abdul Halim)

Setiap nafas yang dihembus

Setiap degupan jantung

Aku selalu memikirkanmu

Dalam sedar dibuai angan

Dalam tidur dan khayalan

Aku selalu memikirkanmu

Ternyata ku perlukan cinta dari dirimu sayang

Barulah terasa ku bernyawa

Kasihku…ku amat mencintai kamu

Kerana kau beri erti hidup

Ku kan terus mencinta sedetik lebih selepas selamanya

Di kala penuh ketakutan dengan badai kehidupan

Ku bersyukur adanya kamu

Biarlah kehilangan semua yang dimiliki di dunia

Asal masih adanya kamu

***** Biarlah rahsia..

..:: Berhabuk::..

2011-02-17T17:04:00.000+08:00

* Bunyi cengkerik...

Er.. jap jap.... sapu habuk jap.

Seriously, Im not a mood of posting any. I do write but it was left as "draft posting". Soon ok. Soon.

XOXO

....:: Love, Your Daughter::..

2011-01-04T17:48:00.001+08:00

One emotion. Heart-wrenching.

Today, after three years of strict diet, after struggling to search the best food, the best alkaline food, organic yet anything that suits to prevent the spread of his cancer, marking this date..witnessed by the so-called doctor in HKL, ayah wants to call it a quit.

I was taken aback. Ayah had an appointment for his neuro this morning. I accompanied him inside and at the same time asked the doctor about his OCD. He was yet to diagnose medically as an OCD patient, but looking at his symptom, he needs to be treated. His anxiety, him being calculative, too particular on cleanliness, feeling too scared to walk alone or being left alone at home and the list goes on. The doctor was shocked when I told him that ayah needs to be feed for each of his meal including fruits. Pernah juga sampai pil ubat pun kena suap ke mulut dia. The doc tested his strength and he said that ayah is strong enough to do it on his own. Siap kata, "Kesian isteri pakcik..". And when ayah said that he always felt giddy whenever he stands up, the doctor trus kata, "sebab banyak duduk pakcik... tu yang pening".

True enough. Ayah is a manja type. His anxiety makes him feel sick. I know its a psychology thing. He make himself sick. *sigh. His daily activity is just resting aka sleeping the whole day. Alhamdulillah the doctor referred him to Muar Hospital for his OCD symptom.

Ahah! About the food thingy, Ayah... on his way out from the doc's office, dia boleh return to the doc's table (with my help la kan via wheelchair), and told the doctor whether he should be on that kind of strict diet. And the doctor gave the answer that I know, ayah wanted to hear. "Enjoy your life, pakcik. Eat whatever you want. Selagi doktor tak suruh jaga makan". Heh.

My feeling? Ntah la. I dont know what is in his mind. Yeah. Maybe all this while, although its a really "healthy food", deep down, he suffered. Although in my heart I refuse to let him quits eating healthy food but I guess I cant bare having the thoughts of regretting for not giving him what he wants.

Parents wants the best for their children. Well its vice versa. Of course I want the best for my parents, the best food, the best hospital, the best supplements and everything under the sun that can make them feel comfortable spending their golden age. But I am just a puny human being, no magic at all to make everything perfect as per my wish. Allah knows better. I believe and have faith on that.

With that ayah, you may eat anything you want ayah.... no restrictions at all. No more organic, no more anti-msg. Outside food, fast food....international food... anything ayah, its all up to you. Please..help yourself. As long as you are happy and you have more strength to perform your ibadah to Him.

Me..fidgetting and praying that Allah blessed him with a better health. Amin.

..:: 2011::..

2011-01-01T23:19:00.000+08:00

Happy New Year! *Err.. Awal MUharam tak sure aku post ke tak ek? Semoga tahun yang baru merupakan tahun yang lebih bermakna buat diriku dan keluarga.

Seperti biasa lah, kalau tahun baru, pasti ada azam tahun baru. Bila di jejak kembali azam tahun 2010, aku hanya ada satu je azam iaitu untuk berjaya dalam pelajaran. *kenapa aku rasa bahasa aku skema? Sila abaikan persoalan saya. Ok, alhamdulillah, untuk tahun 2010, result saya sangat seperti yang diangan-angankan. Syukur sangat. Harap-harap ianya berterusan hingga ke semester yang terakhir ie Jan- Apr 2011. Huhu.

So, azam tahun ini?

Insya Allah, saya bakal menjadi pendidik di pertengahn tahun 2011. Pendidik dan pelajar dalam tahun yang sama. Harapan tahun ini agar segalanya dipermudahkan.

Kerjaya insya allah bakal ada. Namun, satu persoalan yang sentiasa bermain di benak fikiran semua termasuk keluarga dan rakan-rakan untukku adalah tentang jodohku. Hmm..bila agaknya nak merasa nasi minyak kenduri kahwin aku ek? Pernah ada satu ketika, ianya seperti bakal berlaku, namun terkubur sehingga ke hari ini. Untuk itu, saya mangga mulut saya dan campak kunci kat Sungai Muar. He he.

Malam detik 1 Januari 2011, mulanya rasa malas betul nak keluar tapi saya, housemate n tunang hsemet gagahkan diri menapak ke I-City yang jauhnya hanya belakang rumah saya. Berpeluh la jugak. Bersama-sama menyaksikan bunga api. *walaupun dari rumah pun leh nampak, langit Allah kan luas terbentang tp dek kerna mahukan suasana berlainan, sanggup mendaki ke ICity dengan berbekalkan kertas suratkhabar untuk buat alas duduk. Sibbaik belakang umah je. Kalau tak.... tak koser aku nak redah jem di mana-mana pelusok Lembah Klang nih.

Sekali lagi, selamat tahun baru semua! Semoga tahun ini lebih baik dari sebelumnya! Buat adik saudaraku yang baru sahaja menjalani pembedahan hati di Hospital Selayang semalam, semoga kuat dan cepat sembuh. Amin. If my dad can survive.. you can also my dear Aqmal.

..:: Kerepek Merepek::..

2010-12-19T21:36:00.001+08:00

Terkadang, bila baca blog orang yang bercerita tentang perihal kehidupannya..aku terasa nak tulis sebegitu juga. Type everything I eat,drink, sleep or anything under the sun. Namun, with deep thought, I have had enough of bad experience. So, I'll pass.

Then, bila baca blog yang penuh dengan pengalaman dia berjalan ke sana-sini dengan letak foto gambar segala-galanya, tetiba terasa nak kongsi jugak peristiwa jalan-jalan aku di alam maya. Taruh segala gambar aku yang comel-comel dan menawan kalbu. Kah kah. Tapi sure terbantut sebab lately aku semakin malas mengetik camera. Especially bila skang ni dah tak pakai camera phone dan compact camera Olympus ku tidak punya gambar yg memberangsangkan tatkala semua sibuk dengan DSLR. Ohh. (atau mungkin tempat yang aku pergi semua sudah terlalu selalu dan mula membosankan?)

So, bila baca pula blog yang penuh inspirasi tetiba terasa diri ini sangat la useless kerana hasil posting aku banyak yang merapu. Terasa nyesal sebab tak rebut peluang mendapat pahala dengan perkongsian ilmu di blog. Isk. But, bila nak buat..selalu rasa tak best dan semedang aku delete. Isk lagi.

Bila baca blog-blog hiburan, tetiba aku rajin plak post review on what I watch or read. As if ada yang baca kah untuk post mortem derang? Kah kah.

Setakat ini, bila aku browse blog yang menjalankan perniagaan, tak plak aku terasa nak jual barang dalam blog aku. Maybe ader la aku letak trademark Kunyah n BatikHeaven aku. But not to post n sell something in my blog.

Kalau nak kahwin,mesti ada tema..at least warna apa nak pakai untuk baju pengantin. Kalau nak hias rumah, nak lawa kena ada konsep. Nak gi keja kena ada attitude.

So, nak buat dan tulis blog kena ada apa? Harusla masuk internet dulu...

*Apa yang aku merepek nih labu....

..:: Cinta, Pengorbanan dan Airmata ::..

2010-12-04T01:18:00.002+08:00

Natrah

Cinta seorang anak antara ibu kandung dan ibu angkat. Cinta seorang hambaNya yang tersepit antara undang-undang dan juga pegangannya. Cinta seorang isteri yang sangat kasih pada suami dan terpaksa berpisah kerana undang-undang.

Apa yang dikatakan pengorbanan? Mengorbankan pegangan hanya untuk kembali kepada keturunan sendiri? Mengorbankan kasih yang selama ini terjalin tanpa balasan, hanya untuk kepentingan diri sendiri? Mengorbankan perasaan sepasang kekasih dengan membuat keputusan yang tanpa berfikir panjang?

Eh, aku jadi puitis konon. Oh. Berpeluang menonton teater Natrah 27hb yang lalu. Garapan yang sungguh terkesan dalam sanubari saya. Saya sangat, sangat sangat,sangat terkesima dengan props yang dibuat. Syabas Erma Fatima. Sungguhpun banyak kontroversi yang melanda tetapi hasilnya sangat memuaskan hati. Sungguh suka pada lakonan Sofea Jane. Mendalam sungguh bait-bait katanya yang menyebabkan saya boleh feel the Natrah in me. Sedih ok, bila anda yang masih muda ie bawah umur...dan hak anda untuk membuat keputusan untuk diri anda hampir tiada. (Bila saya pakai topi peguam, saya sedar, itu lah hakikatnya. Anda tiada hak dalam membuat keputusan terutama dalam bab menentukan akidah. Case : Re Susie Teoh) Oh, bila saya kembali menjadi diri saya yang melodrama, saya sedar..perasaan muda yang pasti memberontak apabila keinginannya ditentang.

Saya dan housemate aka Naem, seperti mahu *pengsan melihat model Dashing terbaru..Remy Ishak. Sgt kacak ok anda dan juga kelakar kerna anda menari ala-ala Hindustan dengan baju Melayu siap bersamping seperti kayu. Still, hilarious. Maya Karin..dengan pandangan mata kamu sahaja sudah cukup membayangkan perasaan Natrah. Good act Maya. Bravo! Hati saya paling tersentuh apabila babak Umie Aida*emo*. terpaksa berpisah dengan Maya Karin.. bergenang airmata ok. Susah-payah orang tua tuh didik dia,ko nak amik mcm tuh je.. Mana leh.. Teater kali ini mengingatkan saya tentang teater "Dejavu Seorang Perempuan", lakonan Ogy Ahmad Daud. Sorotan lampu untuk pelakon bermonolog untuk meluahkan dialog dengan berkesan. I am sooo feeling it. Watak Natrah tidak didewasakan oleh Maya Karin sahaja, tetapi dilakonkan oleh 2 pelakon lain.... untuk mempertontonkan perasaan Natrah tatkala dia sudah meningkat umurnya.

Lagu di teater Natrah memang catchy and until now I can hummm the catchy song. Unlike Tun Mahathir The Musical yang lagunya sangat sentimental saja.

*Ini bukan pelakon tambahan tapi sahabat yang sudi membeli tiket dan juga menumpangkan kami berdua ke sana. Maceh Khairis..

Overall, brilliantly done by all. Kudos! Hmm. Benchmark dah ada. Any more theater at par or better than Natrah? Will be looking forward to watch. *credit to Naem for these piccies.

..:: All in One ::..

2010-11-23T05:28:00.000+08:00

Alhamdulillah dah abis exam 14/11/2010. Kelam kabut balik JB dek kerna pakcik tenat di Hospital Sultan Ismail.(HSI). Assignment pun settle dengan bantuan housemet tercinta submit kan ke bilik Prof. tatkala aku jauh di Selatan. Memang last minit siap, bila dah finalise je assignment tuh kat pc, dapat sms dari kazen yang pakcikku telah kembali ke rahmatullah. Gegas pergi melawat di Rengit,kampung Arwah. Arwah tidaklah serapat mana dengan ku apatah lagi anak-anaknya. But he is still my uncle. He was the Imam when all of us solat hajat for ayah the day we had a raya gathering back in Muar..the year ayah was first diagnosed with cancer. Semoga rohnya di kalangan orang-orang yang soleh. Amin..

********@@@***********

Berada di JB for few days for kenduri arwah. Simultaneously, jenguk2 umah mak kat Setia Eco Garden tuh. Rumput melangit dah diratakan. Lampu lom pasang. Grill lagi. Tanah banyak batu,so tak leh nak gardening tanam pokok durian. Kah kah. Oh bajet ciput cemana nak buat semua itu? Hmm. Konon last post nak beraya adha di sini, tapi memandangkan tak lengkap serba serbi, maka sorang pun tak terdetiklah nak raya kat situ. Hihi.But will spend a week at least to settle everything for mak when Im still on my semester break. Cuti sampai tahun depan tuhhhhhh.

Hopefully by next year dah ada tenant for the house. Ada sesaper nak sewa tak? Bujang wanita sahaja, sewa untuk 2 bilik. Satu bilik RM250. Insya Allah will be semi-furnished. Those yang keja kat Nusajaya,Gelang Patah, Ulu Choh atau yang sewaktu dengannya lah. Ada security yang satu jam sekali lalu kawasan rumah tuh. Gated and guarded. Sila war-warkan eh?

Why rent it to singles not married ones? Because I want to have the access to the house as well, konon nak gardening lah n surprise my mom. Kah kah. Padahal arituh, baru 5 minit pegang cangkul,tapak tangan dah melecet and mom totally annoyed when I kept looking at my palm."Kalau dah gitu,ko simen je lah umah tuh,tak yah sesusah nak mencangkul". Ye. Dialog ibu ku yang diulang-ulang dekat sedara mara masa kenduri. Cheiss. Ternyata tangan saya memang manja, tak leh nak elak. Ngee.

..:: Random Post ::..

2010-11-10T21:33:00.000+08:00

Ye. Lagi 4 hari nak final paper for this semester. Yeay me! Tapi ada lagi 4 assignment tak siap dan paper tuh macam tak abis belajar. Boo Hoo. Serius. Sila lah boo saya. Kerana saya kan suka pada last minit syndrom. Tsk Tsk. Haha. Well, assignment tuh dah kumpul data. Bab nak mengarang secara kritikal tuh yang selalu fail. Sebab asyik divert je minda ini. Eh? Macam-macam plak alasan ko. *mode marah diri sendiri*. Pastuh, memblog pulak? Haha.

Sesambil layan karangan versi pelajar postgraduate, tetiba teringat kat my all-time favourite movie ie CINTA karya Khabir Bhatia dan lagu Perpisahan, Anuar Zain yang terkesan dalam sanubari aku nih. Oh.. mode sedih boley? Mari sama-sama nikmati liriknya ok? Tiada kaitan dengan yang hidup atau yang mati k. Jangan bikin kontroversi.

Anuar Zain - Perpisahan

Ku mengerti perpisahan ini
Bukan kerana kau membenci
Tapi kasih yang pernah kuberi
Tiada lagi bersama
Seringkala aku terlihatkan mu
Impian nan indah
Bersulam bahagia
Ku harungi hari demi hari
Bersama wajah tak mungkin akan kembali
Tapi hati masih tak terima
Ditinggalkan sengsara

(Korus)
Keraguan ini bukanlah padamu
Perasaan hati masih rindu
Kekalutan ini hanyalah untukku
Tercari-cari bayanganmu
Tak sanggup aku kehilangan
Kehilanganmu
Kasih tercari-cari
Keraguan ini bukanlah padamu
Masih tercari-cari bayanganmu
Tak sanggup aku kehilanganmu

..:: Seindah Nama ::..

2010-11-03T04:50:00.002+08:00

Lihat anak-anak kecil itu sedang berlari. Sangat-sangat bahagia bila melihat mereka gembira. Terutama hari ini, si kenit Nia Khaylila, yang memakai baju kurung biru bunga-bunga kecil. Hari ini hari lahir dia yang ke 5. Satu-satunya anak saudara perempuanku..(setakat ini lah..)

*tuka mode jadi Ucu jap.

Ucu penah post bufday for Adam's 5th birthday, and now its your turn my lil angel. How fast time flies! Nia Khaylila, seindah nama secantik rupa. A beautiful angel in the house. Bakal mewarisi ketinggian ayahnya. Oh, akan rendah la Ucu nanti. I hope you wont be getting married before Ucu ya? *psiko*

This lil angel, is so so independent. Always wants to do everything on her own. So helpful, that she can feed my dad. (ayah makan bersuap kerana pergerakannya yang sukar). So girlish, that she always watch "How-To-Make-Up like Barbie" on Youtube. Siap tanya kat Ucu, "Ucu, nak tengok M-A-K-E spacebar U-P Ucu. Seriously dia eja kat Ucu siap sebut spacebar sebab dia segan. haha. So in love with music, that she can sing most of the latest Lady Gaga's songs. However, this girl, so mischievous, that she always bully her big brother by hiding his fav things. Not a good one Nia. At her age, she truly is a smart lil girl, love to ask around when she doesnt understand any of the words and in the contrary some of her words can be absolutely blunt. Hehe. Boleh jadi lawyer nih. Or..wartawan hiburan? LOL.

With her smile.. it can melt your heart. Segarang-garang Ucu pun boleh cair. Be a good and solehah gurl, Nia. To Allah, ma n ayah and all around you. You have such a unique personality, please get rid of the bad traits and embrace the good side of you. Ucu pray that you'll be someone one day in future. Amin..

Love you dearly. Muacksssss.

p/s Oh, I heard from ma that you want something-that-can-be-played-with as present for your bufday. Can I just give you my hardly touched make-up for you to play? haha. Ucu cheapskate.

..:: Macam-macam::..

2010-10-11T00:58:00.000+08:00

How's your raya everyone? It has already ended. Seronok raya sebulan? Atau puasa sebulan raya sebelas bulan? *lawak my lecturer. Dah ganti puasa? Banyak pulak soalan. This is my post-raya post. My 2010 raya was indeed a truly surprised one. Oh yeahh.. an agitated malam raya incident, teary morning raya and awesome photo shoot raya. Overall its perfect for me.

Usually, I blogged as soon as had my fun fun activities with my gurls. To be honest, since I signed up for Twitter. I just cant stop tweeting about my activities rather than blogging. Hihi. Saya bukan perasan femes. I just love to do this microblogging. I dont really care of the numbers of followers. Only for limited closed friends.

Ookay. Let me see. Already watched Magika, Charlie St Cloud and Devil. Went to Tun Mahathir the Musical at Istana Budaya. And currently, just watched an awesome Psycho with Orchestra at the Malaysian Philharmonic Orchestra. Kebetulan, ada yang nak pergi. I like! Oh..please dont labelled be as a posh gurl with high class activities. Theatre and arts has always been in me since I was born. I think I get this from my dad. *tapi tulisan sy sangat hampeh.

Credit to : http://fremdamericanstudies.ning.com/forum/topics/second-semester-final-exam

So, since raya already over..here comes the most scariest day in a students life..... jeng jeng.. EXAMSS! haha. Its gonna be a hectic month for me. And of course.. nak dekat exam.. masa tuh lah assignment baru dapat. Enough of liburan sayang.. mari kita sama-sama pecah otak.. yippee!

..:: Birthday Post::..

2010-09-08T20:55:00.001+08:00

Thank you Allah. I am so blessed. This year's date : 8.9.10. Nice kan?

I am officially a year older than last year today! Thank you mak for your hardwork during labor. You are the best mom in the world! Muahss. And ayah for your support.

Alhamdulilah dapat merasa nikmat udara. Bernafas dengan tenang. Walau bagaimanapun, masih banyak dosa dan kekurangan dalam diri ini yang sedang saya perbaiki. Doakan saya agar menjadi seorang yang lebih baik dari semalam.

Saya rasa saya dah tua untuk menerima sebarang hadiah.Ternyata saya sangat bersyukur apabila menerima doa-doa dari sahabat tersayang baik yang jauh dan yang dekat apatah lagi di dalam bulan Ramadhan yang bakal meninggalkan kita. Iskk. Dolu, rasa tak bes bila birthday jatuh masa bulan puasa, sebab tak leh celebrate huyah huyeh..but setelah semakin bertambah umur, rasa sangat menantikan ulangtahun pada bulan puasa. Reason being, doa-doa orang yang berpuasa..apatah lagi di bulan berpuasa sangat lah makbul. =)

My celebration for the day. Hm strike 12 am berada di Melaka bersama Mulia. Untuk apa? Untuk buang air kemudian balik ke Muar. I have no idea why I did that. Maybe I missed my cruising days with my girlfriends. Nothing but just stay in the car at the very late at night. Tema mlm td adalah : Gaya Bebas. Just cruising..thank you Mulia for being there for me. I need some fresh air that night. Nasib baik mak cukup sporting mengawalkan terawikh dia untuk beri peluang anak dara dia kuar tgh malam. Sudah besar anak mak ini.

Melaka sentral sesak. Sebab tuh tak kuar lepak memana. Then lepak kat bazar Muar je. Balik jam 2am. Heh. Oh gamba di atas adalah U-turn ke kiri..KE KIRI.. (jarang jumpa di jalan Malaysia)

At home, spending my quality time with my parents. Fist time gi cuci keta auto carwash kt Mua dengan Ayah. Kah kah. Siyes jakun. 3 minit je kot? Then sepetang menganyam ketupat dengan mak.

Pose istimewa mak khas untuk dimasukkan dalam FB. Glemer mak I. Then masak spaghetti brown rice goreng, lauk salmon bakar dan lemak labu utk ayah. Nasi paprik utk mak. Yeah...

Hadiah? Hehe.. surprisingly ada... tudung Arzu from kak Neem, aromatherapy set from Zaidah, telekung from mak (tp dia nak rasmi dulu masa solat raya,sebab aku tak solat)..tetiba rezeki dapat netbook dari TM, hasil pakej student..*consider hadiah gak kan? hehe. Set sofa Jati dan Buaian.. er yang nih bukan hadiah aku tapi arrived on my bufday.. untuk rumah Muar.

Content. Blessed. Love. Getting older but younger at heart... =). Alhamdulillah.

::Menjelang Syawal::

2010-09-03T08:45:00.001+08:00

Hari raya yang ke 28 ku. Ye. Untuk hari raya thn nih saya akan berumur 28 thn 2 hari. Tahun ini, tahun yang saya masih belajar dan tiada sebarang pendapatan yang sebelum ini pernah sy dapat. Hanya elaun belajar maka, perbelanjaan agak terhad.

Tapi saya ada pendapatan sampingan iaitu membantu ibu membuat kuih dan juga menjual kuih. Duit hasil pertolongan ibu telah digunakan untuk membayar saman trafik. Kelajuan 130km/h di Alor Gajah, Melaka. Aku menci jalan kat situ skang. Dah lah 90km/h je leh bawak area situ. Grr.. Sabar. Kelajuan membawa padah.isk. Lebur jap bayar RM300.00. Mak dah awal-awal disclaim duit saman tuh kira duit upah. Sob..sob..sedih. (Sebab aku selalu akan jawab.."masa jiji *abg aku* kena saman keta mak, dia tak bayar kat mak punnnn!!!" Mak aku buat derk. Mungkin sebab kakak ipar aku byr kat dia. Hmmm.)

Tentang hasil jualan kuih sgt memberangsangkan. Alhamdulillah.... Duit semua akan masuk dalam akaun syarikat. Sangat looking forward for next year's production. Moga-moga 2-3 kali ganda dari thn ini. Amin..

Still, mana boleh, untuk raya tiada sesuatu yg baru untuk diri sendiri. Since sy ke sekolah dah tak pakai baju kurung etc, nak beli baju kurung baru mcm rugi. Nak beli t-shirt or jeans raya macam dah banyak. Kasut? Hmmm..... arituh ada beli Crocs time warehouse sale. Dok lanyak pakai mary jane hari-hari sehingga nampak mcm boot Phua Chu Kang pun ada debunya..

Bila jalan2 survey barang apa nak beli utk diri sendiri, tetiba teringin mahu wedges. Ala-ala platform yang selesa. Lama tak pakai kasut yang tinggi sejak masuk balik belajar. So, I need a really comfort wedges for my raya and also for my class.

Hasil pencarian, BERJAYA! Agak pricey utk sy yang tidak mendapat sebarang bonus ini, but sangat puashati. Yerp... my first Hush Puppies. Sangat selesa. Ok Puan Sabrina, jangan thn nih mintak kat Abg Ayie Hush Puppies pula ya. *like what you did last year to have Crocs. :P~~~

Menghabiskan sisa-sisa kelas sebelum bercuti. Selamat bercuti semua! Ingatlah, kelajuan membawa padah.

Merdeka!

2010-09-02T07:20:00.000+08:00

How was your Merdeka celebrations everyone? Mine was an impromptu celebration. I was in Johor Bahru during the weekend and holidays. I still have something to do in JB eventhough I am no longer working in JB and plus I am not a JBians. Biasa lah dah nak raya, I did some kuih delivery for regular customers who just cant buy any other batang burok other than my mom's.

Last weekend was my parent's first introduction to their new house. I have yet to name it. Maybe I will. Ada sesapa nak masuk contest menamakan rumah tuh tak? Dad felt so so happy with the finishings. It was perfect, he said. Im glad both of them love it. He even suggested to celebrate this year's 2nd Hari Raya there. Memang tak sempat lah wahai ayahanda, Raya Haji mungkin.. :) Gosh, I need to fork out some money lah nampaknya to complete the house. The house shall be their house. And also to my aunties, Mak Nah n Mak Esah. Mereka takde anak, I hope I could contribute some happiness by allowing them the access to the house.

Eve Merdeka was fun. Met few friends, Amna n Azizah and went to the so-called Pasar Karat in the heart of JB. I love to go there regardless the traffic and hardness of getting parkings. Managed to watch the fireworks. Its Merdeka Day everyone. What do you have in mind about the Independence Day? With my own eyes, I saw people giggling around, with flags in their hands, with a loud shriek of MERDEKA! Those who are just embarrassed to say it out loud will just laughing it away.

Does their merdeka means something to them than just words? I was at one of the stalls when the clock strikes 12am. Witnessing the craziness, silently I prayed that I am thankful that we still live in peace. Though the political situation currently is quite shaky,(Im with the government,mind you) I just hope that Malaysian nowadays fill their mind depth knowledge, embrace their religion as their most sacred parts in their life and just be thankful for what they gain. Ameen. Then again reality bites.

.. Macam-macam Ada::..

2010-08-27T14:54:00.002+08:00

Credit : info.teamnulife.com

Bulan puasa tahun ini, sekarang dah 17 Ramadhan. Macam-macam berlaku. Mungkin bila bermulanya bulan yang mulia, masing-masing akan mula mengenangkan dosa-dosa silam, pada diri sendiri atau pun pada orang lain. Mana yang gaduh rasa nak berbaik, mana yang dah baikk nak erat-eratkan. Bagus lah. Sekurang-kurangnya ada sedikit sinar Allah kurniakan untuk menjadi seorang yang lebih baik.

Masa bulan puasa juga masa untuk mendetokskan diri. Menurunkan berat badan yang ideal, yang penting inilah masanya untuk kita menguji sejauh mana nafsu kita menguasai diri kita. (sebab syaitan kan dah kena ikat?) Agak2 kalau sahur dan buka asik makan nasik..leh turun jugak ke berat? hehe.

Banyak perkara berlaku sepanjang 17 Ramadhan kat aku. Setakat ini alhamdulillah aku tak da buat hal dengan orang or dengki khianat kat orang . (Kalau ada, tanpa disedari saya mintak maaf sangat2 atas apa jua kesalahan saya yer!) Tapi yang pasti hati ini selalu disakiti dan dilukai. *ok mode emo pula. Apa-apa pun saya redha dan sentiasa memaafkan sesiapa pun itu lama dah terutama tatkala jantung dan hati saya begitu rapat dan hampir dengan Baitullah ketika saya melakukan ibadah Umrah. (Tapi kesalahan yang saya tidak tahu, tak dapatlah sy maafkan kan?)

Di waktu Ramadhan ini, my ex-beau telah mula menghubungi aku. Setelah 2 bulan sepi tanpa sebarang berita. Damaged done. Ill just move backwards.Kawan biasa saja lah. Dan juga seorang lagi ex tiba2 mencemarkan duli dengan menghantar ucapan maaf kepada saya. Sudah-sudah lah berjanji. Hanya taubat nasuha boleh membantu dan renungkan kembali perjalanan hidup anda sebelum, kini dan akan datang.

Cerita kelakar di bulan Ramadhan, aku tetiba terlibat dengan sms/panggilan misteri dari seorang lelaki. Biasanya aku tak layan prank numbers, but somehow ada sesuatu yang membuatkan aku membalas setiap mesejnya. Creepy siott bila dia lebih tahu tentang aku dari aku mengenalinya. Banyak tanda soal sepanjang berkawan dan sehinggalah saya memberikan satu soalan trivia, jawapannya membuatkan saya menghentikan perhubungan ini there n then.

SOALANNYA.....*drum roll pleaseeeee!

"Sudahkah anda berkahwin dengan seorang atau 2 atau 3 atau 4 isteri?" (Sebab kalau aku tanya soklan standard dah kawin ke belum?, dia mesti akan jawab belum...*yang kedua,ketiga, keempat)

Lama tuh dia amik masa nak jawab. Dan anda tahulah apa jawapannya...

Mahu tahu berapa lama perhubungan kami?
Hanya 3 hari. Kah kah. Girls out there, I give my consent to use the said Q. Sila sila guna...

Moral of the story: Tanya awal, lari awal. Tanya lambat..lambat lah nak keluar dari mainan emosi anda sendiri. Pengalaman banyak mengajar aku tentang semua benda termasuklah menggubal soklan trivia. HIHIHI. Dah. Nak bershopping.

..:: Ramadhan Al-Mubarak ::..

2010-08-10T19:21:00.000+08:00

Ahlan Ya Ramadhan..

Selamat menjalani ibadah puasa semua. Panjatkan kesyukuran kerana berpeluang untuk menikmati berkat Ramdhan untuk tahun ini. Beribadatlah sebanyak mungkin untuk Ramadhan kali ini sperti ianya adalah Ramadhan terakhir buat anda. Ampun dan maaf sekiranya ada salah dan silap sepanjang posting di dalam blog ini.

*sedih tak dapat sambut rahmat 1 Ramadhan... sob sob..

..:: Kisah Miow Miow::..

2010-08-06T00:01:00.001+08:00

I just cant help it. I need to pour something here. An incident I will never ever forget. But first, let me ask you whether u have seen this one video clip, which showed about a couple of bird, one died and another one is like asking tweeting for help and at one point he just couldnt help it, but feeling sad of the loss of a friend or a significant other. (Mana nak tahu jantan betina kan?)

Well, with my own eyes today, I witnessed a similar situation. It involved two cats. I did not witness the accident, but all I know, my heart really sank when I saw the situation of the two cats.

I was driving to Seksyen 9 this morning and from afar, I saw 2 objects. I was at the left lane and when my car got nearer, I managed to see one of the objects was a cat, already been hit by a car or lorry or apa2 lah and while I was trying to avoid hitting the poor cat,(which I managed to avoid) I saw another cat, still ALIVE, a meter away from the dead cat. Looking so so mellow, and the saddest part was that the survived cat was just lying in the middle of the road, heads up, tail waggling and his eyes only rooted to his poor friend.

I can still remember the look. The eyes and the body of the survived cat did not stir an inch even when my car was moving and avoiding his dead friend. Kesian sangat... Maybe if I have a super power, I can even hear him purr..to wake his friend up. Alahai. I blamed myself for not helping the survived cat. I did not do it because, I cant bear looking at a clearer view of the dead cat.

Just imagine, a cat not knowing that his life is at risk, waiting IN THE MIDDLE of the road,(the right lane) looking and hoping that his friend or significant other to wake up.. Ohh.. sememangnya, my eyes filled with tears now and I bet each time I read or remember this piece of memory, I will cry..

Which reminds me of my Atam so much. (seperti gambar di atas). He has been a good friend when I live alone back in Melawati during my chambering years. When I got a job offer in JB, knowing that he will get into catfights frequently in JB (a lot of stray cats in jb especially my area) as compared to Muar, I decided to leave him in good hand at my parents house. Both of my parents love him too. Ayah especially. Sebab Atam tak yak-yak sepah2. He either pooed in the toilet or elsewhere and not merata2 in the house. Sangat manja. Sangat ganas bila lapar. ie.. akan menggigit kaki anda bila dah bau makanan.

He will always waits for me either under the car or atas tembok umah whenever I came back from JB. And if I had to go to KL for any official work, sometimes I do bring him along. He behaves well even if without cage in the car. Sometimes he sleeps on my lap while I was driving. Seronok dia bila dia main tangga kat rumah melawati. Ya Allah rindu nyaaa....

But when Ayah was diagnosed with cancer, with his frequent schedule to KL hospital. Atam was a bit left out back in Muar. Maybe out of hunger or depression or sadness he left the house and until now he never came back. Sedih, rindu.. dan juga of guilt. For not taking good care of him. I hope he forgives all of us, for the mistakes that we've done. It was not done purposely. I always hope that one day he will be back, purring with his unique voice..each time when he enters the gate. Kucing yang selalu bagi salam. =). Kalau tak jumpa di dunia..harap2 di akhirat dan harap2 saya tidak di kategorikan sebagai manusia yang zalim pada binatang.... Isk..

Atam @ Cikenit.. will always miss you and no other cat can replace you in my heart..

.:: Silence::..

2010-07-27T16:24:00.003+08:00

Credit to Citrus County

Of silence. Not because of the break up.~~Er..konon-frust menonggeng?~~ But I am currently facing too much things-to-do and writing a post in this blog is just not one of it. Finally today, I have been left alone at my rented house in Shah Alam with all the household chores, (only mine) and alhamdulillah after getting it all done, now I can post something in this dusty blog.

Did I tell you that after Umrah, my dad's platelet is not so good which hesitant the doctors to proceed chemotherapy for him? If the chemo is one of dad's option after operation (which cant be done due to his chronic stage), then what comes after chemo. What is the next option? Is there any? The latter q really freaks me out. Alhamdulilah, the oncologist referred us to the Liver specialist in Selayang until dad's blood is "ok" for his next chemo. Frankly, I am prepared for the best and also for the worst. But having an ups and downs of the result about ayah, makes me berdebar ok! I know dad's condition is like a time bomb, but I just hope that somebody in the hospital can explain to us explicitly in layman terms what exactly happens.

It was frustrating, when we went to see the Liver specialist few days back, the doc said that we were supposed to meet this Dr S way before going for chemo treatment. I mean, 2 years back tu ke doc? Treating my dad's cancer and also his Hep B is like a two different thing and therefore, it has to be separated into two division in the Hospie. Allahuakbar, its the same organ lah!.

Ok. Tiba2 emo. I know I am a lawyer not a doctor. The things Im mad at is so beyond my jurisdiction. Nak tahu apa yang saya sedihkan? Just imagine, because of the above fact, dad is supposed to have 2 appointments within a day, or maybe more. First, kena daftar..for the first appointment at level 3. Then wait for your turn for the blood taking. (same level nasib baik). Then after the blood taking, need to go for ultrasound, at level 4, kena daftar lagi because its a different thing, then waited for the ultrasound. Next, waits for the doc's consultation.Then abis jumpa..balikk..

Tidak. Saya bukan menyalahkan sistem kesihatan kerajaan. Saya hanya ingin melontarkan satu situasi yang mungkin dialami oleh beberapa orang awam, dan semoga suatu jalan penyelesaian akan dapat diatasi. Okeh. Just imagine the above situation involves an elderly man with a wheelchair and his significant other is not that healthy as she may look. The fact that both of them had to wait and walk, to and fro, ups and downs, within a day for the appointment. Penat kan?Yes. My mom did all by her own and I regretted that I was not besides her for the whole day due to my class schedules.

I wish that there are NGO's that have some team of volunteers to assist those people. Dah nama volunteers..surely free of charge kan? Kalau takda special team for volunteers pun, at least ony one of you.. if you come across any elderly in need of help, please help them. Betapa besarnya rahmat mu di akhirat kelak. Ada cons pula bila dah ada volunteers, mungkin anak2 akan dengan mudahnya neglect their parents at the hospital, padahal sepatutnya mereka yang bertanggungjawab ke atas ibu bapa mereka dunia akhirat.

Sesungguhnya Allah S.W.T. berfirman: “Dan hendaklah kamu beribadat kepada Allah dan janganlah kamu sekutukannya Dia dengan sesuatu apa jua; dan hendaklah kamu berbuat baik kepada kedua ibubapa.” – al-Nisaa’ (4) : 36

Rasulullah s.a.w. bersabda: “Keredhaan Allah terletak pada keredhaan ibubapa manakala kemurkaan Allah terletak pada kemurkaan ibubapa.” – Hadis riwayat al-Tirmidzi di dalam Sunannya, no: 1821.

Well said, berdoalah agar kita sentiasa berbuat baik kepada semua terutamanya kedua ibubapa dan satu hari nanti anak-anak kita akan berbuat perkara yang sama kepada kita di usia tua kelak... Amin. Oh about my dad, currently he is taking medications for his liver. which is supposed to be taken 2 years ago. Humph.

Nota kaki : post ini adalah cerita penyesalan saya, tiada kaitan tentang sesiapa.

..:: Me and My beau::..

2010-07-10T01:25:00.005+08:00

http://www.sodahead.com/fun/whats-your-favorite-shape/question-78153/?link=ibaf&imgurl=creoleindc.typepad.com%2Frantings_of_a_creole_prin%2Fimages%2Fsewing_a_broken_heart.jpg

As I was browsing through my older posts, I found something that I have drafted on the 27th April 2010, and has yet to post for some reason and the post is as per below:

"Its been so long that I wrote about my loved one. From my previous blog, there's Mr P or Mr A or another Mr A..hmmm and then I have realized that enough of too much detail and I stopped writing about the person Im seeing. In this blog, I do write some add-ons about my beau, but not a really long-winded post about us. Until today, I feel like writing one.

We have been together for almost a year. To be exact, both of us agree that Minggu Saham Amanah Malaysia brings us together ie starting April 2009. Selagi wujudnya event itu di Malaysia setiap April, maka mudahlah bagi kami untuk mengira dan mengimbau detik pertemuan kami berdua. Tetapi untuk anniversary date untuk couple? Err..technically kedua-duanya tak tahu bila. Kah kah. Sangat zaman kanak-kanak Ribena lah kalau perlu adanya tarikh kapel.

Perjalanan hubungan kami tidak begitu mudah. Sangat roller coaster. Tekanan keluarga serta sahabat handai. Miscommunication, financial instability and also when I had to further my study, the relationship becomes a long distance relationship..again yada yada. Somehow we manage to hang on to this relationship until today. But for how long it will stays..Wallahualam.

He makes me smile even if I was mad at him. Kami selalu bertekak, masing-masing mahu berkata dan tiada yang mendengar. Sakit hati bila kalah, puas hati bila menang. Hehe. He makes me laugh with only his laughter. He is the most difficult man I ever met, yet I still can bear with him. Ramai kata aku pelik dan sangat tahan sabar dengan perangai dia. Yerp. Sekurang-kurangnya I can see his honesty in this relationship. Mungkin saya sudah bosan dengan lelaki yang mulut manis dan goody2 di awal perkenalan, dan rupa-rupanya ada udang di sebalik mee. Life is a gamble. Experience makes you wiser.

Last weekend was a great date night. Er..konon2 sambut anniversary kot? Semoga perhubungan ini berkekalan dan sentiasa diredhai Nya. Amin.Cant wait for our ultimatum in June. Hmmm."

Its July now, and I have finally decide my ultimatum last June, few days I was back from Mekah ie not to continue with the relationship. Period. Too much heartache and headache between us.

I guess I know why I did not publish the said post...

..:: Pengalaman Pertama Umrahku ::..

2010-06-28T22:05:00.001+08:00

Hari 1
28 Mei 2010, Jumaat

[Clockwise: a) Kami sedang menunggu di KLIA, b) Kegilaan anak AbuBakar-Hawa, c) PIA,Pakistan International Airlines d) Ayah tidur dengan 3 seat sekaligus daaa e) Tetamu Allah.]

Penerbangan jam 1.30pm waktu Malaysia. Bakal transit di Karachi, Pakistan. Kalau ikutkan brosur yang diberi, akan tiba di Karachi jam 1600. Ingatkan hanya 2 jam setengah penerbangan ke Karachi, rupa-rupanya, 1600 adalah waktu Pakistan dan bukan waktu Malaysia. Pertukaran waktu buat kami semua pusing. Kah kah. Penerbangan selama 5 jam. Next flight ke Jeddah 2030 (waktu Pakisan).

Pengalaman di Pakistan untuk pertama kali. Ye, saya masih hijau dalam melihat dunia. Petugas di sana secara terang-terangan meminta tips selepas membantu ayah dengan wheelchair. Siap tanya, "No money?" bila kitorang dah berada di tempat yang ditunjukkan. Oleh kerana tidak bersedia dengan rupee, kami bagilah wang RM instead. Nasib baik kami diberi privillege untuk masuk terlebih dulu di dalam perut kapal kerana keadaan ayah.

[Clockwise: a) Di dalam bas penghubung airport Jeddah dengan kapal b)Tangga kapal c) Tgh tunggu luggage di Jeddah d) Bulan penuh wooo.]

Dari Karachi ke Jeddah mengambil masa dalam 4 jam. Kemudian, sampai di Jeddah perjalanan kami diteruskan ke Madinah dengan menaiki bas selama 3 jam lebih. Penat? Lebih kepada sangat teruja. Di bibir memang tak henti berzikir kerana mahu perjalanan selamat dan tidak sabar untuk menjadi tetamuNya. Cuma kesian pada ayah kerana keuzurannya. Memang kalau tak kuatkan badan,sangat penat turun naik flight, dan bas dan dalam tempoh perjalanan yang panjang. Peringatan buat diri..sesungguhnya setiap ujianNya adalah untuk membuat diri ini lebih bertakwa kepadaNya.

Hari 2
29 Mei 2010, Sabtu

Alhamdulillah, tiba di Hotel Al-Mawaddah Noor, Madinah jam 0500 waktu Madinah. Sayang terlepas jemaah subuh kerana waktu subuhnya adalah jam 0400. Saya diuji apabila terpaksa berjauhan bilik dengan ibu dan ayah. Saya sebilik dengan jemaah wanita lain, manakala ayah, ibu dan abang ipar duduk sebilik. Bila ustaz kata itu yang sebaiknya, setelah pening tukar2kan bilik, saya akur sahaja. Kalau ikutkan, ibu dan saya sebilik bersama 2 jemaah yang lain dan ayah n abg ipar di bilik berlainan. Daripada ayah dan mak duduk berasingan, lebih baik saya yang dipindahkan..

Selepas sarapan pagi, dalam 0830, kami berkumpul di lobi hotel untuk ziarah dalaman Masjid Nabawi termasuk Raudhah, Maqam Rasulullah SAW dan sahabat lain serta perkuburan Baqi'. Bergerak bersama-sama, tetapi jemaah terbahagi kepada dua ie lelaki dan perempuan bila telah tiba di bahagian dalam Masjid Nabawi. First time menjejakkan kaki di masjid Nabawi, subhanallah, dan perasaan syukur tak henti2 diucapkan di dalam hati kerna telah diberikan rezeki untuk berada di situ. Sangat cantik ok..

Security di dalam Masjid Nabawi sangat ketat, tiada camera termasuk hp camera boleh dibawa masuk. Akan ada pegawai keselamatan wanita berjilbab hitam yang akan memeriksa setiap inci beg anda. I was informed earlier by my aunty, so memang dah niat untuk menikmati kenangan dengan mata kepala sendiri, lalu tidak membawa apa2 yang dilarang untuk lawatan itu. Masuk di dalam Masjid Nabawi, solat tahiyatul masjid dan juga dhuha. Kemudian, ke Raudhah ie sebahagian daripada rumah Rasulullah dan ianya dikatakan sebagai salah satu dari taman syurga. Sedang saya asyik menikmati keindahan di dalam masjid (besar dan luas dalam dia ok!), tiba-tiba wanita guard jilbab hitam menjerit "Raudhah!" kat aku sambil tangannya menghala ke suatu tempat. Kaget seh. Lalu langkah aku semakin pantas ke arah tempat yang ditunjuk.

Oh, rupa-rupanya untuk kaum wanita kawasan Raudhah hanya dibuka untuk waktu yang tertentu dan sangat terhad. Oleh itu, jemaah kami sangat beruntung kerana waktu itu Raudhah telah dibuka untuk jemaah wanita. Patutlah guard tuh marah semacam..as in,pelik bila aku mcm relaks dan tenang2 je jalan sedangkan yang lain semua berpusu2 mengharapkan untuk memasuki kawasan Raudhah.

Subhanallah, saya dapat masuk ke bahagian Raudhah, ie yang mempunyai karpet yang berwarna hijau. Saya bercadang nak solat di tempat yang kurang orang sahaja, tetapi ibuku menarikku agar ke hadapan. Serius siut, dengan keadaan orang ramai PELBAGAI BANGSA bersesak2, meraung2..dan semuanya merebutkan ke saf hadapan. Ok, saya kurang pengalaman lalu "I follow" je la. Sukar untuk solat dengan sempurna apabila bersesak-sesak terutama dengan orang yang lebih besar dari kita. Hanya dapat sujud dan berdoa di sana. Niat dalam hati agar mahu kembali lagi untuk solat di saf depan.

Hari ke 3
30 Mei 2010, Ahad

[Clockwise: a) Perkuburan Baqi', b) Masjid Quba, c)Kedai Kurma di Ladang Kurma, d) BIL di kilang Al-Quran, d) Bukit Uhud e) Ustaz Redhai bagi penerangan f) Menikmati teh Arab g) Me and ayah di Masjid Nabawi]

Masa untuk ziarah luar di Madinah. Kami ke Masjid Quba', Masjid Qiblatain, Jabal Uhud dan seterusnya ke ladang Kurma. Masjid Quba' adalah masjid pertama yang dibina oleh Nabi Muhammad SAW. Dek cuaca yang sangat panas, saya terpanggil untuk membeli jilbab atau naqub di gerai tepi jalan. 10 riyal tuh. Ala-ala macam Aisyah Ayat-ayat Cinta gitu. Masjid Qiblatain tak dapat singgah, hanya lalu sahaja. Sejarahnya, nama masjid tuh bermaksud, masjid 2 qiblat. Tatkala Rasullullah sedang menunaikan solat di masjid tersebut berkiblatkan Masjid Aqsa, baginda menerima wahyu agar qiblat ditukarkan ke arah Kaabah. Jabal Uhud, persemadian sahabat2 Rasulululah yang syahid ketika berperang. Ustaz terangkan, pernah sekali berlaku banjir besar di kawasan tersebut, dan mayat-mayat di dalam kubur timbul seperti baru meninggal padahal telah beratus tahun meninggal. Subhanallah.

Bila di ladang kurma..borong sakan lah. Sebenarnya tamau beli sangat sebab mahu ke pasar kurma instead. Tapi memandangkan bas tak bawak ke sana, terpaksa lah order je kat Ustaz soh belikan. Oh well, bagus gak..kalau tak sure rambang mata. (walaupun kurma? ha ha)

Hari ke 4
31 Mei 2010, Isnin

Aktiviti bebas. Solat berjemaah. Shopping juga. Ibu, saya dan abang ipar bergilir2 tunggu dan jaga ayah di hotel. Tapi bila bab shopping..memang saya dan ibu lah. Niat kami sebenarnya, agar bila tiba di Mekah nanti, kami tidak banyak melebihkan waktu untuk membeli belah.

Sesudah maghrib, ustaz soh berkumpul di Pintu 1 Masjid kerana ada seorang pelajar Malaysia telah sudi mendapatkan kelulusan agar kami dapat mengadakan lawatan di Muzium bawah tanah Masjid Nabawi. Gila kentang beb, especially bila student tu kata biasanya lawatan kat tempat tuh untuk VVVVIP je, Puan Seri..orang2 kenamaan. Wah! Lagi best bila tempat tuh kami perasan, betul2 di bawah kawasan rumah Rasulullah ie, Maqam2 dan juga Raudhah.

Di situ, dapat tengok videoclip dalam 20 minit tentang pembinaan Masjid Nabawi dari dulu hingga sekarang. Sangat kagum dengan usaha yang dibuat oleh King Fahd demi untuk kegunaan umat Islam SELURUH DUNIA! Sangat detail dari bumbung hingga ke parking dan aircond bawah tanah.

Ada juga naskhah mushaf Quran yang lama. Maybe ada yang pernah melihatnya di mana2 Pameran di Pusat Islam..tapi untuk aku, tak ternilai melihatnya di Negara Arab, Tanah Haram Madinah di dalam masjid Nabawi.

Kami selesai membuat lawatan sebelum azan Isya' berkumandang. Isya' yang terakhir (untuk lawatan umrahku 2010)..kerana esok kami akan mula bermiqat dan menuju ke Mekah.

Hari ke 5
1 Jun 2010, Selasa

Subuh terakhir di Masjid Nabawi..(ehem, utk lawatan umrahku 2010) Sedih. Rasa seperti berpisah dengan kekasih. Kekasih Allah. Selepas sarapan, aku, rumet dan mak kembali ke Masjid Nabawi untuk melakukan ziarah wida'. Masa sampai, pelik kejap bila keadaan sungguh tenang dan tak berebut2 macam masa mula2. Oh, rupa-rupanya guard2 membahagikan jemaah mengikut negara. Indonesia dan Malaysia serumpun lalu di letakkan dalam satu kumpulan yang sama. Bila time Malaysia dapat masuk, ingatkan Raudhah kosong lah..tapi memang tidaklah kan, disebabkan masih ada warganegara lain yang masih tidak mahu beredar. Alhamdulillah, dapat solat betul2 di saf hadapan di Raudhah. Bergilir2 dengan mak dan rumet. Harap-harap bukan yang terakhir..

Pulang ke hotel bersiap-siap dengan pakaian ihram untuk berniat mengerjakan umrah. Bermiqat di Bir Ali. Solat tahiyatul masjid, solat sunat ihram dan seterusnya berniat untuk mengerjakan Umrah. Memandangkan ini merupakan Umrahku yang pertama, maka ia jatuh hukum wajib. Berdebar tuh tapi kena yakinkan diri yang semua perkara yang dilarang ketika di dalam ihram tidak dibuat. Dari Bir Ali hingga ke Mekah, kami satu bas bertalbiah. Perjalanan mengambil masa dalam 5 jam. Tiba di Mekah, masuk bilik, makan dan seterusnya bersiap untuk Tawaf dan Sa'i.

Dengan langkah yang mengujakan, sambil tangan memimpin ibu..hati yang sangat tak terkata perasaannya tatkala menuju ke Masjidil Haram. Apatah lagi apabila pertama kali melihat Kaabah. Menitik air tanda bersyukur kerana diizinNya melihat dengan mata kepala sendiri dan sesungguhnya dibibir,tak henti2 membaca ayat 1000 dinar, agar dimurahkan rezeki supaya dapat sering ke Mekah,sujud padaNya di Baitullah.

Pengalaman pertama melakukan Tawaf, disebabkan perasaan was-was mengenai posisi bahuku... aku tambah 2 kali lagi Tawaf. Jumlahnya 9. Tak kisahlah janji Umrahku insya Allah mabrur. Sa'i pula, duhh letih berjalan tetapi mengenangkan aku perlu menjadi kekuatan untuk ibuku..kuteruskan tanpa rehat kecuali untuk minum air paling enak di dunia, Air Zam-zam. Tanya jugak kat mak, nak benti rehat kat tepi dulu ke tak etc..tapi mak mahu gagahkan diri untuk teruskan.(walupun sebenarnya aku yang dah tak larat. Kah kah) Alhamdulillah selesai bertahalul, umrah pertamaku pun selesai.

Hari-hari seterusnya adalah amal ibadat biasa yang dikerjakan. Sesungguhnya, terdapat 120 rahmat di Masjidil Haram, 40 rahmat dengan hanya memandang Kaabah, 60 lagi apabila tawaf, dan baki adalah bersolat di Masjidil Haram.

Lebih lama di Mekah berbanding di Madinah..apa2 pun masih rasa sekejap dan tak puas... Tak puas rasanya kucup Hajar Aswad, tak puas solat jemaah, tak puas solat di Hijir Ismail, tak puas berdoa di hadapan Multazam, semua serba tak puas. Semoga Allah menjemputku dan semua saudara dan kenalanku ke sana lagi. Amin..

[ Di Masjidil Haram ; Gua Hira']

[Di Jabal Rahmah; Hotel penginapan; Makanan merpati di hotel]

[Menunggu untuk pulang; Bag yang beranak pinak, Si nakal mengacau Muthawwif; Cobaan selendang Arab; Di Masjid Terapung, Laut Merah]

..:: Im back ::..

2010-06-21T22:06:00.000+08:00

Alhamdulillah telah selamat pulang dari Tanah Suci. Sangat lah mahu mengupdet ceritera umrah di blog tercinta ini.Tapi terpaksa ditangguhkan dulu kerana ada tanggungjawab keluarga yang perlu dilaksanakan. Menunggu gambar2 terkini dari camera phone my sister pun ye jugak...

Ok.. a glimpse from there...

..:: Lambaian Kaabah ::..

2010-05-26T18:32:00.000+08:00

Daripada Zaid bin Thabit berkata, sabda Rasululullah S.A.W, Haji dan Umrah itu diwajibkan ke atas kamu (setelah cukup syaratnya) dan kamu boleh mengerjakan yang mana satu terlebih dahulu.

Assalamualaikum semua.

Maaf dipinta andai ada salah dan silap, terkecil hati, tersilap bahasa, khilaf saya sebagai seorang insan. Andai sesuatu berlaku pada saya, dan ada hutang peribadi yang masih tertangguh, harap dihalalkan atau dimajukan kepada waris saya.

Semoga perjalanan saya bersama-sama ayah,ibu dan abang ipar dipermudahkan pergi dan balik, serta mabrur Umrah kami di sana. Perjalanan ~~long vacay~~ ini yang sangat-sangat saya tunggu sejak dahulu lagi. Mohon doa dari kalian semua.

Ya Allah, hamba Mu ini melalui perjalanan jauh untuk datang memohon rahmatMu dan menuju ketaatan kepadaMu, menurut perintahMu, mengharap keredhaanMu dan berserah kepada perintahMu, diri yang penuh diliputi dosa ini Ya Allah, aku bermohon sebagai orang yang terdesak yang takut daripada azabMu, harap Engkau menerimaku dengan kemaafan, mengampuni dosaku dan mengharamkan diriku daripada api neraka.

Amin Ya Rabbal Alamin...

..:: All Momma's Day::..

2010-05-09T17:09:00.000+08:00

If the whole world were put into one scale, and my mother in the other, the whole world would kick the beam. ~Lord Langdale (Henry Bickersteth)

Happy Mother's Day, Puan Hawa Hj Anuar...!

Weird. It took me a long time to write this post. I was just looking at the pic above and thinking all the great things my mom did for me throughout my life. Endless countings. Thats why Im stuck, too much love to pour, too much events to share, more emotions involved, her thoughts, her ramblings, her effort, her life as a daughter,wife and mother, her hobbies, her favourite food, her concern, her sacrifice..and the list goes on.

Mak is a garang and moody type of lady. Yet, she is someone who forgive easily, loving with her own way, sensitive, very determine with her work, generous and urghh... all the good adjectives shall be in her. Most important thing about her is her sacrifice towards us especially to Ayah.

Heart you so much mak and I promise I will be a good daughter and will soon give you the best gift ever from me...ie a good son-in-law. :-). He who will understand that how much me and you need each other even if I am supposed to be in his family for good. Insya Allah. (*aku penah ngobrol dengan mak yang aku tak nak kawin sebab tahu nanti mesti aku kena ikut laki and cannot do the usual I stuff I do for my family dahh..tambah efek nangis teresak2 sket. Gila drama kan?)

.:: Amarah ::..

2010-05-01T01:50:00.000+08:00

Oh. Hari semalam hari yang sungguh cacamarba. Betullah bila orang kata hidup ini bagaikan roda ada ups and down. Mana mahu cerita dulu. Mahu cerita yang atas atau yang bawah? Isk... mula dari awal pagi lah. *tetiba dah lama tak updet dengan detail harianku. Sila la menguap dulu...

Pagi. Bersiap sedia mahu ke Putrajaya untuk mengambil surat hikmat di J**. Ye. Saya sedar saya salah kerana saya tak melaporkan diri. Tapi itu tak semestinya justify kan anda untuk lambat buat kerja i.e untuk menyempurnakan surat kelulusan saya. Saya sepatutnya dah dapat surat hikmat tu dari minggu lepas dan pegawai terlibat kata akan telefon. Tiada sebarang telefon dan dek kerana sibuk mahu konsentrasi untuk exam, saya ketepikan dulu, dan tidak updet ie telefon J**. [Perlukah saya updet bila at the first place sang pegawai itu menjanjikan bahawa ia akan siap dalam 2-3 hari]

Heh. Mujur tak terus ke Putrajaya pagi-pagi. As predicted, bila saya call dulu seblm ke PJ (Putrajaya) sang pegawai kata surat tak siap..dan biasalah, alasan "masih ada dalam bilik bos " digunakan. Oh bengangnya saya. Tapi mengenangkan saya dulu pernah menjadi pentadbir, pernah juga melalui kekangan yang melibatkan bos, saya hanya mampu bersabar dan just follow the flow.

Jam 10 lebih,sang pegawai telefon kembali dan kata boleh ambil petang selepas lunch hour. Dan berkata bahawa dia mungkin tiada di pejabat tatkala itu dan dia kata lagi " dalam kul 3-3.30 lewat-lewat sket leh la dtg amik". *Er..aku bukan nak jumpa kau pun!. So, saya dengan perasaan berbunga matahari, sampai di PJ jam 3.30pm. Sebelum naik ke atas, ~~or sebelum my blood go upstairs~~, saya call lagi just to make sure that I just have to pick it up confirm settle dah. And guess what...sang pegawai punya staff kata, sang pegawai tak ada dan surat sain lagi.

I was like, "WHAT??!!" Oh geramnya saya lagi. Wahai sang pegawai, tahulah hari jumaat dan anda ada waktu yang paaaaannnjaaaaanga nak gi shopping ke, makan ke... haih..malas nak bebel rasa. Sekali lagi saya sabarkan diri saya. Ye lah. Dugaan kecil. Mungkin selama ini saya pernah khilaf semasa menjadi pentadbir, lalu ini ujian saya. Hearing my frustrated voice, the staff made a suggestion that she will email to me the letter. Double bengang sebab deep in my heart aku dah agak confirm aku tak akan dapat surat tuh in piece on that day. Still, the suggestion sedikit mengurangkan amarah saya.

At 5pm, the staff called and informed that the email has been sent. Ok. Alhamdulillah. Boleh shopping Mother's Day pressies for mak dengan tenang. Ye lah dengan surat itu, walau pun emel not knowing that there is another hurdle, saya dah boleh selesaikan dengan UiTM ASAP pulak for the next process. However, sampai di rumah, gegas tengok emel, rasa nak pecah gegendang telinga Naem mendengar jeritan batinku.

The email existed in my inbox, but the attachment was only the first page of the letter WITHOUT the signing page. AND...tetiba dalam surat tuh ada Perjanjian some more. Im like..URGHH! Tensi tau...aku dah banyak mencarut dah di hari Jumaat yang mulia nih. Menitik air mata tau..ye lah, sang pegawai tak tahu kondisi aku yang sangat-sangat perlukan my scholar to survive and it felt so not fair for her to be that ignorant. Dah tahu tak rasa nak masuk ofis,or meeting, or lambat or apa2 lah, tolonglah selesaikan surat tuh dulu. I still remember her saying, "Ala..surat tuh 5-6 minit leh siap...".

Aku tak salahkan staff dia, sebab staff sokongan ikut arahan je. But if she told me earlier that there is an agreement, confirm aku tunggu depan opis dia dan dapatkan surat and perjanjian tuh by hand in one piece. I dont feel like waiting because when I was in service, I hate people pestering you to do this and that and I totally dread when they wait for you until they get their things. Emel dihantar tak lengkap. Perjanjian haram lah tada dalam emel. Nak tunggu hard copy, bila urusan hari Jumaat, Isnin lah baru kuarkan for despatch. yada yada...ntah2 seminggu lagi baru dapat. Nak kena settlekan UiTM lagi. I need to be back to Muar on the 9th at least for Mother's Day la ngets! Haih. Kena work out for plan B nampaknya.

Sangat-sangat maksima kesabaran saya hingga terbit air mata. Bertisu kejap dengan beau. *as if dia membantu.heh. Beau quote statement abah dia, "Kalau dengan pegawai macam tuh, biarlah sampai ko rasa macam ko minta sedekah pegang tempurung sampai ko dapat apa ko nak, lepas ko dah dapat, pegi jahanam lah orang tuh". *gulp. Mind you his father is a government pensioner. Mahu kah anda dilayan dan didoa begitu? Mahu? Mahu?

*Nasib baik shopping kasut Crocs memberikan sedikit kegembiraan, sepasang untuk Ibu untuk ke Tanah Suci. :-).

..:: Moi ::..

2010-04-18T21:27:00.001+08:00

Break Through lyrics

Why is it so hard

It was so long ago

I don't know where to start or what to say to you

I've been all alone needing you by my side

But its not too late

Maybe we just needed time

Can we try to let it go?

If we don't than we'll never know

I try to break through but you know that its up to you

We say that time is meant to heal

But it still hurts inside

I wish that none of this was real

Cause we're so far behind

You've been all alone

Needing me by your side

But its not too late

Maybe we just needed time

Can we try to let it go

If we don't than we'll never know

I try to break through

But you know that its up to you

And I know that our love can grow

But this damn river needs to flow

I will try to break through but you know that its up to you

Its time to make a stand

Maybe it won't last

But we should take this chance

Can we try to let it go

If we don't than we'll never know

I try to break through

But you know that its up to you

I know that our love can grow

When this damn river needs to flow

I will try to break through

But you know that its up to you

I'll try to break through but you that its up to you

I'll try to break through but you that its up to you

-Colbie Callait-

..:: Me, Me..Me::..

2010-04-17T10:25:00.002+08:00

Ok. Timetable exam diubah. Nasib baik makin lambat. Saya sebagai pelajar memang suka pada last-minute panic syndrome. Saya suka take for granted terhadap masa yang banyak ini. Tahu. Rugi. Sesungguhnya manusia berada di dalam kerugian. 103:2. Dulu, masa sibuk, saya kecewa tidak dapat baca buku dengan tenang sebab banyak kerja. Bila dah banyak masa, saya buat perkara lagha. Baca buku cerita yang seronok2, tengok TV (Naemah pasang Astro yang ada HBO,Starmovie yada yada.) Tidur. MukaBuku. Blogging..eh? Blog jarang sikit sebab dah malas menulis. Ok..bloghopping. Tgk wayang. Hm. Nasib baik beau jauh. Kalau tidak, pasti aku dah jelajah 1Malaysia. 1Malaysia je, satu dunia RM lom cukup. Maybe, masa buat PhD.

Terukkan saya? Saya kagum dengan mereka yang membuat part time. Terutama yang sudah berkahwin. Gagahnya...manakan larat nak menyiapkan assignment, bersedia untuk test atau final, menyiapkan makanpakai suami dan anak2, bekerja di bawah majikan yang ntah bagaimana fiilnya. Andaikata mereka lebih cemerlang resultnya, alangkah malunya saya. (*_*).

Ooohh macam mana saya nak dapatkan kuasa sakti untuk melonjakkan semangat saya ini!!!!! Tamau tamau result teruk... haish. Lalu saya akan jadi hermit. Self-discipline yang tinggi untuk membuat semua kerja. Ya Allah Bantu lah hambaMu ini. Berusaha! Doa dan tawakal.. Oh, kuatkan saraf-saraf otakku untuk ligat menyiapkan assignment, dan juga menyerap ilmu bagaikan sponge. Terangkan hati agar khusyuk dipermudahkan ilmu dan menjawab soklan final. Lembutkan hati pensyarah-pensyarahku agar mendapat ketenangan menanda kertas ku dan dengan murah hati memberikan markah yang tinggi kepadaku dan juga sahabat2 yang lain.

My ramblings. Sesungguhnya saya manusia yang lemah. (-__-).. Biarkan saya. Huhu.

Final : 29/4 - Copyright Law & Design
8/5 - Patent & Trade Mark Law + 3 Assignments on TM and Patent to submit on the same day!

Harap maklum.

..:: His Diet ::..

2010-04-11T23:54:00.002+08:00

Sebagaimana yang semua maklum, ayah saya seorang pesakit kanser hati. Hepatitis B to be exact. Kalau di Hospital Muar my dad's file siap ada sticker Biohazard, sebab sebarang transaksi yang cuai boleh menyebabkan seseorang mendapat infeksi Hepatitis B dari ayah.

Two years back, a doctor whom is my own flesh-blood (literally darah daging) cousin told us that 70-80% of that stage of cancer patients can only survive for 7-8 months. Painful, yet all of us need to be strong. Regardless, all of us managed to go through every thick and thin together to always be optimist with ayah's condition. One of crucial thing to fight the cancer is about his diet.

None of us in my immediate family are doctors nor nurses, apatah lagi oncologist, pharmacist nor nutritionist. So being laymen in medicinal area, we were totally clueless on what is the next step for dad. My uncle advise us to do some reading on cleansing the cancer and not concentrating much on chemical medications and what not. Indeed alhamdulillah the articles in the internet do open up our mind setting in fighting the cancer.

All this while, we thought that the only way in curing cancer is through medications and grueling numbers of chemotherapy. Instead, its the cleansing and detoxifying your body before any hospital treatment can help to maintain the inner strength of your body. With Allah's help and lots of prayers, it works for my dad.

Every body has its own cancer cells. The difference between anyone of us is whether the cell is inactive (benign) or active (malignant). How does it become malignant and be cancerous to us?20 years back, maybe the doctor will write in his report that the cancer has been inherited from immediate family but nowadays anyone with or without family with cancer background can be diagnosed with any types of cancer.

It is all depending on your most important thing in life : WHAT YOU EAT N DRINK. Ada juga faktor lain yang boleh menjadi penyebab kanser but for this post I would like to concentrate on the abovemention factor. Nowadays, the food we eat or even the water we drink can be dangerous and has carcinogenic essence which may lead to malignancy. So, to flush all the toxic we have consumed, we need to detox ourselves and once we succeed with the healing crisis, our body will be replenished and feeling much better. Terlalu ideal isn't it? Believe me, it works provided that you have to discipline yourself.

I read that chemotherapy will destroy the cancer cells, and also the healthy cells. So, if there's not much healthy cells in our body, what is left for us? That was why before any grueling chemicals to be inserted in our body, we need to prepare a shield for our body by consuming the correct food.

Before that, I need to disclaim myself that, I am no oncologist nor nutritionist, this writing is purely on my own experience and through my readings here n there.

First thing to do is to remember these formulas : NO SUGAR, MORE ALKALINE, NO ANIMAL'S MILK, NO POULTRY and MEAT.

Second : Change white rice to brown rice. It must be organic and unpolished.

Third: More fruits and vegetables. There are few fruits that is acidic needs to be avoided. It is better to have it organic, but it will make a hole of your pocket. So, you have to wash the fruits and vegetables thoroughly before consuming them.

Fourthly: Make the patient comfortable with himself and strong enough to go through his sickness. A happy day will boost his happy endorphins. However, having negative emotions will deteriorate his conditions no matter how much medicine he eats and all the healthy food he consumes.

Fifth: Additional supplements to be taken:

Lentin Plus 1000

Salvestrol

Erm. Sangat mahal ok. Am not going to put the price here.

Sixth : Drink lots of plain and filtered water. Green tea is a great drink for tea. NO coffee, or HOT Chocolate or even normal tea.

Seventh : Being a cancer patient does not mean you have to stay on bed 24-7. A light walk will advisable, but provided you have to avoid any toxic elements around you, for example, mosquito spray, or any pesticides. Kedengaran paranoid kan? Tetapi itulah hakikatnya. Cancer patient are so fragile and even a sniff of chemical odour may worsen their condition.

And the list goes on. My advise. Do Google and read articles on detoxifying. For the guideline, you may wanna read this book, The Complete Cancer Cleanse, by Calbom & Mahaffey as your guide.

Bersyukur pada Tuhan. Ayah survive in his own battle. We still continue with his healthy regime because we wouldnt want any relapse to happen. Insya Allah, keran itu Mak decides to bring Ayah to perform Umrah for all His help. Semoga perjalanan dipermudahkan.Ameen. Panjang sungguh entri ini. If any one of you wanna ask anything, feel free to give your email in my comment box.

..:: Movie Again ::..

2010-04-11T14:45:00.002+08:00

I think my movie day is a seasonal thingy. Ahaks. Well, as been posted in my FB and Friendster's status.

" April = Tests + Assignments + Final"

To date. Its April. I shud be breaking my neck reading the books. Kah kah. I will. When the last-panic syndrome falls into my vein. *Tsk tsk... not good. *~~Merbahaya: jangan lakukan di bawah hidung ibu bapa.~~

Its Date Night everyone!
A movie that I hope my guyfriends will love it when they were forced to watch it with me n Mulia @KLCC. Nasib baek korang gelak sehingga hampir pecah gegendang telinga ku kiri dan kanan. Kalau tidak sure aku rasa bersalah paksa korg tgk citer itu.

A story about a boring married couple who had pretty much the same routine of their daily lives including their date night. Ie berdua-duaan tanpa anak2 di sisi. Not until one night when they had to face lots of happenings just because of one mistake they did that is "Faking themselves up becoming Mr and Mrs Tripplehorn."

Its good to have Date Night with your spouse.

Downfall: Jangan lah ke tempat yang sama, makan yang sama dan cerita perkara yang sama. Reality bites. You may not want that to happen tapi without realising it, it actually happens gradually.

Me-still-single- two cents of advice:
Kena selalu buat post mortem at least on your anniversary date. Looking at the past is just to learn a lesson for a better future BUT not to start blaming your significant other for the mistakes they did. Bak dalam lagu Jangan Ada Benci by Casey:

"Ungkit-mengungkiti..Sakit-menyakiti. Memusnahkan diri..."

Chiow.

..:: Movie Post ::..

2010-04-05T12:01:00.000+08:00

A movie goer I am. Though people around me think that I have lots of time to watch latest movie in the cinema, nearest 2km away from my house, but to be honest, its no fun at all if you watch it alone. I've watched movie alone but that was whenever I had issues with myself or with my work. Currently, no issues of myself because Im always content and thankful for my day as a student, and of course no hassle about my work because Im not working y'all! So, it has always been about having fun with your friends...

GREEN ZONE
A dizzy movie I must say sebab camera dia gerak2 yang pening. If you set aside the political part and the reality check you just cant critically analyse this film. It is all about finding truth. In this era now, with all the information we can easily find via internet and others, it is important to do due diligence before you jump into any conclusion. You'll be surprised when you find the truth.

Me, Mulia and other few friends went to OU after Shaf's engagement ceremony to watch the movie. Mulia kepingin untuk tgk wayang bersama-sama ~~Izwan Shah~~ rakan sePerhentian. Gua layannnsss kan aja. Seusai movie, kami ke William Corner untuk late snack. My first time there. Heh.

ALICE IN THE WONDERLAND

A good colorful movie. I thought that it is about the typical story of Alice, but somehow its about the continuation of Alice in the Wonderland. Luckily I did not watch the making of.. kalau tak sure kills the surprise. My degree of patience need to be maintained high enuff while watching this film with the kids. Sebab my Nia whom still cannot read the subtitle, kept on asking me what did the actor/actress said in the film. Hehe. Demi mu si kecil, Ucu layannnnn je.

Went with my anak-anak buah serta Kak een dengan anak2 nya. Gosh I felt like already a mom, luckily my anak buah called me out loud as "UCU" rather than "MA" in which my Nia sometimes slips her tongue by calling "MA" for me.

Had splendid weekend only with my anak2 buah in JB. Their parents wanted to go for Amy Concert and me shall babysit. Had errands regarding the house in Ecogarden. Penat layan karenah budak. I really in dire to have my own kids. Insya Allah soon. Get married first k.Haha

UP IN THE AIR

Jap..*drool dulu untuk George Clooney. sangat hotness lah si kacak itu. Tua2 pun masih boleh mencairkan hati wanita dengan rupa paras itu. Ini merupakan sebuah drama ~~KayuSuci.~~ (hollywood). Kisah seorang lelaki yang bekerja 270 hari di seluruh US dan selebihnya di rumah. Adohai, aku yang setakat dlm mesia pun penat apatah lagi dia. But, at the positif side, he really embraces the work by having it all perfectly done. Susun baju dengan kemas, beg yang mudah dibawa, everything in control... He doesnt feel lonely at all all this while when one day he met a lady whom has similar working system. Turn out, she has a family and he is just a parenthesis.

Typical movie, usually a guy will always dump a lady. But this movie is another way round. Heh.

I watched with Mulia and Shaf. After our sumptuous dinner @Tony Romas, The Garden Midvalley. Kelakar bila kenangkan balik the small sirloin piece that Mulia drops under the table, the Forty-Four Pla pla Per pax, the blank screen @GSC counter. Our get together before Shaf off to Japan for her Phd. Dont worry Shaf, we will visit u there!

CLASH OF THE TITANS

About the God of Zeus, anak Zeus si Persues lah..Hades, Kraken. Oh heck. I wont bother the history. The story line, agak lembs and ridiculous. I cant help but to LOL especially bab Zeus bagi Perseus duit belanja. Personally, bila cerita tentang ketuhanan, this is all crap.

Oleh kerana first time saya tgk 3D dengan spec yang cool, saya layankan je lah. I watched on the first day it was launched with 4 of my guy friends at Cathay Cineplex The Curve. Had lunch @Tony Romas again! Kopak aku...huhu.

..:: Selangkah Lagi ::..

2010-03-24T00:19:00.005+08:00

When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.
~Nora Ephron, When Harry Met Sally

Aaaah...engagement bliss.. Frankly, when I have reached at certain age where people starts to ask you all the typical questions without taking consideration of what I am going through or had been through..Ill just shut them off by saying "Insya Allah" with a smile as if Im so in love with someone. Then the rest of the q will be answered with smiles all the way. Truth is, Im getting annoyed. To the extent I kinda had the feeling of running away from the society to avoid such questions.

But I am totally not running away from sharing the happiness of my dear friends whom shall be married soon. Quite surprising when this year most of my closest friend will be someone's wife this year...hihi. I cant help it but feeling so content for them. Lain perasaan bila kawan biasa bakal berkahwin... or our best/closest friend bakal kawin because you know most of the story mory morning glory about them. So, having through all the thick and thin and finally getting another step of marriage is such a blessing.

My Zaidah, engaged to Zaini on the 19th Dec 2009. Wedding 10th June 2010. (psst..ihsan dari FB mu ya!)

(Atas permintaan sahabat, sebahagian post ini dipadam..)

Wan Mardiana (my LLM classmate) engaged to Jai Mohamed on 14th Feb 2010. Wedding : June 2010 (FB Wan Mardiana)
My housemate, Jannatul Naemah engaged to Faizal Kadir in February 2010. Wedding : Yet to confirm. (tuh dah tak sabar jadi mak org) Note: model cilik bernama Umar Iskandar b Asril

My Shafrida Sahrani, engaged to Aris Nizam on the 21st March 2010. Wedding : Yet to confirm.

Me and my friends were 25 minutes too late to witness Shaf's ceremony. Not knowing that the ceremony was held earlier than as planned. Who to be blame? Tak dapek nak tgk reaksi penunang yang mendapat cincin pilihan bakal mertua.hihihi.

I hope I will be free for the above weddings.... if not, Ill try to make up by organising hen party kot? Kah kah. There goes the surprise.

..:: Zee Avi ::..

2010-03-22T12:17:00.006+08:00

Read: This is going to be a looooong entry.

A silver lining in disguise in each thing you encounter..I was hurt badly last week because of non-so-good friend. But I receive my reward the next day. *big grin.

HISTORY
It started when my brother asked me whether I wanna go to Zee Avi concert. (who the hell is Zee Avi?) But because I know he will pay for the ticket, heck just say yes.. But I have to buy for him lah because he is not in KL. Heh.

We were in vain because it was sold out. But somehow a contest in AirAsiablog struck my eyes. And my fingers to enter. Its a KANTOI blogcomments contest. Hmm...the contest was only for short period and only 11 comments at that time. Apa lagi.Gua enter la cerita zaman muda mudi gua yang ponteng kelas ugama. Bacalah di sini. (under my name of course)

On Friday morning..did small chat with Naem n my jog mate about Zee Avi. ye lah.. I just knew her when my bro called me. Lucky me, in the evening, Branding Air Asia emailed me and stated that I WON! woo hoo. TWO VIP PASS TO THE CONCERT. Menjerit dan joget kesukaan lah aku.

Decided to ask my SIL, a privilege and a time out for her. Let my bro attend the kids. Heh. Bila lagi kan?

PRE-CONSERT

With lots of enthusiasm and excitement, I drove like mad to Melawati to fetch my SIL and to KL LIfe Centre. Adam hates my new way of tudung and my new hair..but insist to ask me to wear tudung when I said to him that I want free hair for the concert. *good nephew.

We reached early but the line already started. Lucky me, I just have to call Mr Tan, the Branding Dept of AirAsia for my VIP pass and cut the line. Cute guy.hihi. There was a bit of misunderstanding upon our arrival. We've been given a "normal" seat which is a standing crowd. Huhu. But Mr Tan the cutie handled it gracefully. When we were ushered to the VIP seats..it was WOW!

Nobody told us where NOT to seat so we assume we have the privilege to seat anywhere. Haha. Lalu "chup" di tempat paling best... sofa putih selesa yang rupa-rupanya adalah seat Marina Mahathir & family with Dato Tony Fernandes.Gila kuasa kan? Hihi. Sibbaek sempat posing dulu.

THE CONCERT

*Enjoying it to bits. Especially the free flows of finger food. Haha.

POST CONCERT
Sangat mendukacitakan apabila ianya akhir sangat awal. Tak puas rasanya dengar her voice. Tapi apa2 pun..again Mr Tan make my night when he ushered and waited for us to meet Zee Avi in person.

Alahai si comel Zee Avi. Dengan rambut yang tinggi, sangat sweet dan matang. Layan kami dengan baik. Mengambil gambar..dan autograpgh di CD. Akibat marker yang kurang kualiti (tapi sibbaek minah tuh bagi pinjam, tq minah itu!) Zee's signature dah makin faded lak. Had the chance to meet Dato Tony. I was introduced by an air stewardess whom I just met n borak2, sat next to me through out the concert as "her friend that won the contest". He then congratulated me.. awh..how flattering..!

Splendid night. Tapi tak habis di situ sahaja. Mengheret my SIL to lepak with my fellow friends in Puchong. Mereka tahap bagi statement aku overdose gula or steroid. Too hyper because of the consert. Haha. What ever it is, Im clean ok? Arrived at 2am at Melawati. And my brother pula keluar. *haishh...bila lah nak lekat duduk dalam rumah abang aku itu..

..:: Hati ::..

2010-03-18T22:12:00.003+08:00

credit from :http://raydrevil.blogspot.com/2009_03_01_archive.html

Orang kata Melayu ramai ada PhD. Dulu, aku tak percaya. Sekarang bila dah lebih suku abad hidup di alam nyata, aku mula percaya. Tapi pada aku bukan Melayu je, semua kaum pun. Terkadang, bila "orang" bagi statement macam itu, kalau di fikirkan dari sudut pandangan secara positif, dia nak mengingatkan kita bahawa tak elok ada PhD, dan statement itu tidak semestinya mendoakan kita agar tergolong dalam kelompok orang begitu.Boleh rosak kesejahteraan agama, bangsa dan negara.

PhD Doctrate? Heh. "Perasaan Hasad Dengki" lar...

Terus-terang saya tulis, sepanjang saya hidup, dengan jarak lingkungan radius tidak lebih dari Shah Alam, serta waktu terakhir berjumpa adalah 24 jam, saya tidak pernah jumpa lagi sahabat baru atau lama yang merupakan talam dua muka sehingga lah hari ini. Saya ditakdirkan oleh Nya untuk bersahabat dengan seorang yang talam dua muka. Yang selama ini sekelas dengan saya hampir 3 bulan.

Maksud talam dua muka : Apabila seorang itu akan bermuka-muka, depan kita mungkin baik tetapi di belakang kita dia memfitnah kita.

Kalau PhD dan talam dua muka, bergabung...? Heh.

Disclaimer: Aku tak suka nak mengata orang. Siapa aku nak mengutuk ciptaan Ilahi? Allah je yang boleh melaknat makhlukNya. Oleh itu, pada aku perangai dia begitu with reason. Walau pun dia kutuk macam-macam kat aku.

Tapi peliklah. Sepanjang tempoh degree, tak penah aku ada masalah dengan group assignment. Biasa lah cakap belakang, tapi standard lah zaman belia yang masa itu sedang mengenali perangai manusia. Tapi sekarang di waktu mengambil Sarjana, yang sepatutnya lebih matang, masih ada perasaan PhD waima di dalam group assignment.

Isk. Ini baru time buat assignment. Macam mana lah dia nak bimbing orang staf bawahan dia. Or boss dia bear dia dengan perangai begitu. Or pegawai-pegawai lain bermesyuarat dengan dia. Or even nak mendidik keluarga dia kelak? Aduhai. Semoga saya dikurniakan kesabaran dan iman yang tinggi untuk sentiasa tabah menghadapi dugaan ie karenah dia.

Benar kata-kata seorang sahabat, setiap kita ada aura. Ada aura yang menolak dan ada aura yang menarik. Sebab itu, dalam 10 kawan dalam kelas ada yang leh ngam ada yang tidak. Hmm. No wonder she seems so fake from day one I met her. (Ops..kutuk dia pula).

Tidak perlu la saya explicitly terangkan di dalam alam maya ini apa yang telah berlaku. Cukup lah telinga my beau dan my hsemate mendengar bebelan saya mengenai saudari itu malam ini. Esok adalah hari baru.

Semoga kami mendapat markah yang tinggi di dalam assignment itu. Aminnnn. Dan pengajaran untuk hari ini.....*nenong nenong (bunyi siren sket). Larikan diri anda dari menjadi group mate dia lagi...lariiiiii lariiiii......

..:: Jay Bee Busy Bee ::..

2010-03-09T15:09:00.005+08:00

Last time, when I was working in JB, I always looking forward for any outstation work in KL. Lots of friends to catch lots of stories yada yada... And now..its vice versa when I am now officially living in Klang Valley to continue my studies. Time so limited, dan banyak event perlu dipenuhi. Regretfully sorry to my beloved colleugues di JB yang tak sempat berjumpa. Nanti kita jumpa k...?

Last Saturday, we had a surprise Baby Shower party for beloved Marliza Yanti. Seronok memeranjatkan wanita mengandung. Sib baekk tak deliver dan-dan tuh gak. We thought of not screaming "sURPRISE!!" at her..but it was actually the other way round. Wanita mengandung itu yang menjerit keterperanjatan lalu kesukaan melihat rakan2 yang telah memecah masuk (dengan izin) rumahnya. hihi.

Lihat lah gambar2...Wanita yang tergezut..dan si suami yang partner in crime melaksanakan tugasnya dengan penuh bijaksana dan pelan2..
US
Permainan meneka ukurlilit perut wanita mengandung..
Kami lagi...
Oh ya. Satu lagi kegembiraan saya tatkala di JB. Subjeknya adalah di atas. Alhamdulillah....

..:: Perhentian Getaway ::..

2010-03-02T11:26:00.006+08:00

3 hari 2 malam bagai tidak cukup untuk ku.
Tapi terpaksalah....meninggalkan pantai yang indah ittew..
Our journey starts midnite of 26th. Had to push off late because I had a test. Huhu. Picked my dear classmate up and off to Puchong to park my car.

2 cars, 4 gentlemen, 4 beautiful women... to Perhentian Island with love.

Our first day at the Island..is a non-camera day. Ntah macamana semua boleh lupa bawak semua benda termasuklah air. I was dehydrated and burnt. But heck. Still loving the sun and sea...

We had BBQ on the first night. 2 times of snorkelling, free flows of drinks and bread, playing cards (ye dod baru belajar blackjack) beach volleyball...playing with the sand..Aaaahhhh. A honeymooners place menjadi gegak gempita dengan kehadiran kami berlapan. Suka suka suka! I hope this will not be my last beach vacay ya sementelahan muka ku telah kali kedua terbakar. I had to be a ninja beach for my 2nd snorkeling.

Memandangkan dod tidak membawa camera, hanya menunggu ihsan rakan lain yang membawanya..hehe so antara keindahan terindahku....

Impiani Beach Resort
Kami Bertujuh, Yang kelapan tukang amik Gambo
Laut yang Biru...
BBQ Nite..heaven...
Nampak tak Miss Ninja itu? Menunggu masa untuk snorkel. Nampak penyu..ikan todak dan yu nampak saya..
Pose dalam air....
Makan-makan...
Aku suka sungguh gamba ini, dod yang turun snorkel hanya untuk diambil gambar dalam air,kemudian naik bot.hihi
Fishy fishh
Me and Dayang..my new fwen..
Go! hehe Me and Izwan..another new fwen..
Aku main tampar2 pipi ikan tuh..hihi

..:: Jauh ::..

2010-02-25T14:57:00.003+08:00

(http://www.inviaggionelmondo.it/Malesia/Perhentian_Besar.JPG)

I need to have my getaway...
Though I have no workloads...
Yet finals is not that near...
And my financial state is near to negative..
Heck....
I need to go to that place.

Yerp... far from the south..
Try to have new experience and meet new people...

:=)

Impiani Resort, Pulau Perhentian....I will meet you tomorow ok? Wait for me....weee...

..:: Konsert Satu Suara::..

2010-02-13T16:48:00.002+08:00

Siti yang sangat sporting

The end of the concert..

Me and my Naem...is that my official rock concert attire? Mcm penah pakai untuk konsert Amy Search la...

A really superb performance by 3 renowned Malaysian artist in town. Sangat-sangat fun, adrenaline pumping..well except when slow rock songs been performed la kan. The sound system was awesome. Kelunakan suara ketiga-tiga yang tidak perlu dipertikaikan.

Frankly, I was there just to enjoy the performance, not really a fan for any three. Credit given to Naem kerana telah berusaha mendapatkan tiket ke konsert itu walaupun seat adalah di upper circle. Dan juga diriku yang menghabiskan sisa-sisa gaji di UTM.

TYT Melaka & spouse dan Tun Mahathir & spouse were at the Gala night. Our tickets were higher than the normal ones because part of it will be contributed to the Malaysian AEON Foundation. Oklah tuh, sambil enjoy musik sambil beramal.

Never been to any of Siti's consert and only had the chance to watch her concert dalam tv je and mostly her performance in ballad and traditional. But last night was absolutely different. If any of you've watched her performance in Juara Lagu last January with Lan the Typewriter, well that is the kind of performance she sang last night. And its A LOT! Meremang bulu ketiak bila dengar high pitched dia..WOW!

Bak kata siti, "rock sopan". Makcik-makcik dan pakcik2 yang nak datang tgk Siti, sure tergezut lah dengan range muzik dia. Er..but at the first place pun makcik,pakcik, konsert tuh "Featuring Siti" je, bukan konsert dia sepenuhnya.

For Faizal Tahir, I adore you.. Anda seperti sudah pulih sepenuhnya. Your vocal sangat-sangat menikam kalbu. And adik Aizat, anda boleh pergi jauh... jangan pergi tak kembali sudah.

We waited for the autograph session even though its already 12.30am. I managed to meet them up close during the solo photo shoot. Er..(knowing that Naem will kill me...) I did shook hands with all three of them to congratulate them for the great concert.

Sangat penat tapi puas. Will find some time (and money) for the next other show pulak... ie Suatu Masa by Amy Search this 26-28th March 2010. Any one joining? Haha..paling mahal RM300 and murah RM80.

..Kisah aku dan Kereta ::..

2010-02-10T15:28:00.003+08:00

(credit from jeannie-jing.blogspot.com)

Kereta saya (bukan di dalam gambar tetapi keadaan yang sama di dalam gambar) telah memulakan operasi kurang sihat terhadap saya. Pertama, pagi tadi tatkala saya sedang memanaskan enjin kereta, meter dia gagal untuk melonjakkan tanda sepatutnya setelah jenuh saya ketuk2 skrin dashboard. Saya gagahkan pandu kereta kerana dalam tempoh 5 minit takkan tak panas2 lagi kot?

Kedua, Aircon macam bersekongkol pulak dengan meter keta. Kurang sejuk dan keluar bunyi pelik. Haishhh.

Ketiga, kereta tercinta di saat pusingan U-Turn di depan pintu UiTM dan empunya keta nak buat drift baekkk punya, terketuk meter dashboard lalu tiba-tiba peningkatan meter ke takat "H" yang mencuakkan empunya kereta. Perghhhh tak penah2 aku bawak keta sampai naik temperature.

Hati tenang. Signal ke kiri, dan berhenti di bus stop yang berdekatan. Bukak bonet depan, Dang! Berasap keta aku. Masuk balik dalam keta. Bernafas dengan tenang. Bukak signal emergency, kemudian ambik tepon. Since my friend's beau adalah mekanik, maka nombor itu lah yang aku call. Hmmm. Memandangkan dia kata aku tak in urgency untuk ke kelas etc so dia soh aku tggu kejap.

Hm. Check dalam keta ada 2 botol air, oleh itu aku gunakan untuk mengisi radiator di kala enjin sejuk. Haha. Temperature naik, rule dia, just isi air, tapi dengan syarat tunggu enjin sejuk. Lalu, bersenang-lenang lah aku di tepian bus stop sambil telefon mereka yang pernah membedah kereta aku.

Alhamdulillah, bila air dah diisi, temperature ok dan boleh bergerak. Lalu aku meneruskan perancanganku untuk hari ini sebelum ke kelas Kak Zai petang ini. Such a wake up call. So I decide to make a rule for those women yang kini membawa kereta melebihi 9 tahun.

1. Pastikan di dalam kereta anda sentiasa ada botol air paip sekurang-kurang 2 botol.
2. Pastikan anda membayar bil telefon anda atau mempunyai kredit untuk membuat panggilan.
3. Pastikan anda mempunyai kain kotor untuk kegunaan enjin keta. Anda pasti tidak mahu merosakkan jari jemari dengan kekotoran minyak enjin bukan?
4. Jangan panik andai perkara di atas berlaku kepada anda.
5. Last but not least, paling penting, keselamatan diri anda dan barang berharga. Pastikan sekiranya anda berseorangan di dalam kereta atau perlu keluar untuk menjadi mekanik bidan terjun, pintu dikunci sentiasa.

Di kala gini lah yang rasa mcm nak mencari pasang bf sorang kat Shah Alam. Muahahahahaha geteks kejap.

..:: Adnan Semp-It::..

2010-02-08T22:22:00.006+08:00

I was supposed to watch with my beau when I was in JB last month, but to no avail, the cinema was closed for the whole day with due respect of the loss of our Sultan. Al-Fatihah...

Since I had the feeling that it will take a long time to meet him again, so I guess Ill be watching the film without him. Gladly, had the chance to do so with my new classsmate in school, her name is Mardiana and coincidently is in relationship with a guy name Faizal. Naemah (my housemate) is in relationship with Faizal as well... Hmmm Faizal Club anyone?

Anyway, movie ini meninggalkan perasaan yang sangat refreshing. Gelak terbahak bukan kerana lawak slapstick tetapi lawak yang penuh bermakna. I cant help it but to lurveeee Sam Shaheizy. That chap is so natural. Aku dah jatuh cinta since dia bawak watak jadi hanturaya dalam Jangan Pandang Belakang Congkak. Anda seperti menonton filem romantik komedi Hollywood versi Malaywood. Idham surely did his research with all the chick flick films and transform it into filem jiwang karat Melayu yang hampir bermutu.

I do missed my beau when I watched that film, because part of the film totally remind me of him. I heard of "Chikaro" wayyy before the film was premiered. He said it was the name for female cockroach in Mexican. Haha. Sebab dia selalu kata aku ini " Chikaroo Cekadak Nantes", translation bila aku banyak songeh n cekadak dengan dia. haha

Skrip dalam Adnan Sempit yang mempunyai hujung, "Der", selalu digunakan oleh my beau. I always wonder what is the full word, is it "Brader" or something else. Rupa-rupanya dia kata, its "Kanda", to show high regards to men especially those who lend him the lighter or give him one or two cigarettes. Heh. Itu interpretasi dia ye tiada kaitan untuk memiliki sebarang hakcipta bagi idea etc.

"Muka saya nampak je brutal, tetapi hati saya macam taman bunga"..or lebih kurang begitu lah skrip dia. Haha. The said dialogue may or may not related to my beau. Still, its hilarious..sangat drama king...

All in all, I am so into the film and I am grateful that I met the guy that really opens my mind on a different horizon of this world and also about myself. You wont know them unless you are with them. Its all up to you to give your own judgement or critics. However all of us are not perfect and not all of us can complete the imperfections for each other. There are better ways unfolding, sometimes it may not sound good but at least it will make your lil heart feeling happier than before.

Hence, in reality in my current relationship, moving on our own separate ways shall be the best solution for me and my beau. Well, technically I already did when I moved to Shah Alam. My feelings? Unfeeling. He is still a good friend of mine.

..::My Vanity::..

2010-01-27T12:44:00.006+08:00

Alhamdulillah. Im done with all the formalities back in my previous office. Missed all the friends there. Sayang sangat tak dapat nak jumpa semua. I wish I cud spend the whole day that day to meet all but family need me more. Dad back in the hospital for post operation bleeding. Maybe he was quite active during the recovery days, to n fro in the car.. or maybe because of any infections from the operation. Sian ayah, kena back to his kain pelikat 24-7 because of the drainage bag. However, he is recovering alhamdulillah now.

(sempat dari JB ku jadi driver untuk makcikku ke Muar to visit my parents. Dad before admitted for bleeding)

I am back in Shah Alam. Thankful that my car is safe and sound parked at Seksyen 17 for 5 days in a row. Thanks to my dear Azah for breaking my leg with her tale that my car had been smashed.Good one.. I shrieked like mad ok?

I received a non-shocking response about my weight from various people. Haha. I am so overweight and I have to admit that with this kinda size, *sambil pointing my figure, I am supposed to have at least 2 children. Haha. Heck. I know I am a sucker for munching all types of food. Tambahan lagi dengan terlalu banyak masa untuk banyak tido, makan dan tido lagi di rumah sementelahan kelas hanya 3 kali seminggu.

My weight is like a roller coaster, so di bulan sunat untuk perbanyakkan berpuasa iaitu Rejab, Syaaban dan Ramadhan (yang ini wajib puasa) pasti saya turun berat badan. Tetapi soon after Raya Puasa, surely I will hate to go to the weighing machine. I also has the feeling that traveling makes me craves for food, just to make me stay awake while driving and stay fit to have the strength to move around here and there. Having four different kitchens ie Muar,Shah Alam, Taman Melawati and Bandar BaruUda,JB,will make you fill your stomach whatever been served. So, I may have no choice but to enjoy the food.

Regardless with all the comments and critics (my beau lah yg selalu kutuk), I am totally embrace this weight. I do look chubby and thanks to my javanese features, those chubby cheeks on the face look as if I have two red tomatoes on my face. *sila muntah pada hakikat ini. And I guess putting a smile to anyone will make their day. *eceh..

Oklah. Saya kena terima hakikat juga yang saya perlu kurangkan berat badan ini untuk lebih sihat dan berstamina tinggi. Lalu, I will make sure I eat well, drink lots of plain water per day and follow my swimming regime strictly. I am so missing the blue-ish chlorine-not-good-for-your-hair swimming pool. No late food during the night and eat less sugary and salty food. Hehe. I pray hard for the success. Pray for me too will ya? Or should I just puke to be anorexic? Haha...

Much obliged.

..::Lil Ones ::..

2010-01-20T11:22:00.006+08:00

Selepas beberapa jam insiden kemalangan berlaku, saya serta rakan serumah telah ke Subang untuk melawat baby Hanizah dan Muhaimin. Oh...Am pun ada. N Ana dengan pantas memandu dari Damansara untuk bertemu kami of course dengan membawa bakal jelitawan Alysha.. Enjoy the piccies credit to the owner, Marliza Yanti. Muah!

Seperti poster filem bak kata seorang sahabat di dalam FB. Yeah. Kudos to Am for taking such beautiful photo.

Am yang sema-sema, Dod n Naem yang tak pedulikan camera, hanya Arman di hati mereka..alolololo

Kami berempat yang sudah besar panjang...

Mama baru yang menunggu untuk hotss semula..

Bersama Mama Ana yang dah kembali hot

Aunty Didi (TeeDee) yang sentiasa hot..

Aunty Naem yang buat2 hot kissing Arman..

Er...Daud dan Dod..Daud yang tgh prektis jadi bapa yang hot lagi beberapa bulan.

..:: Kereta Oh Kereta ::..

2010-01-18T12:11:00.000+08:00

Let me just write it all down....with calm..

I had an accident last saturday. Betul2 depan Kompleks PKNS. The story begins when..

I was leisurely driving around Shah Alam, to kill the time before heading towards MASUM(MATTA International Fair Selangor for Umrah & Muslim Travel Destinations). Then while

driving along in front of PKNS, I saw this Pajero is trying either to enter to the Parking lot or to reverse or what not. And I also saw this red Honda trying to cross from the other side of the road, but somehow reversed when it saw my car moving.

I just drove pass the Honda and also the Pajero when suddenly DUMMMM! The Pajero hit my leftside passenger door. Panic siut. Never had any accident..alone pulak tuh. I wish my beau is nearer to me..haish.

Pulled over to the side of the road and had a really tense conversation with the Pajero guy. Tense? Tak jugak. Ill just said to myself, if the guy starts to act snobbish, I will abso-f**kingly be annoyed and of course will reciprocate to his reaction. Since he looks cool and willing to discuss, I ask him to go to the police station with me. Coincidently, he is one of the travel agent in MASUM. Heh.

Met his fellow officemates.(I am so going to tie him down if he tries to run.) Then we went to the police station. However, we only manage to park in front of the police station and discussed again and finally we decided not to report to the police station. I know in this case it may not be 100% on his side so I decide to lock the deal by throwing and offer that he shall pay 90% and me 10% of the cost. Wow, he abruptly agreed. The deal is locked. Aint that easy? Tho somehow he tried to negotiate but I made him clear that the fact that I am willing to pay is a really big though, and because ur stupid Pajero hit me and not even my fault at all,doh. Well, he reluctantly agree.

I went to a workshop, surely not my friend's. Roughly get the approx price for the repairation. Then, went to pick him (the Pajero is his company's) to go to the workshop back to let him negotiate with the mechanics. He said that he will pay on Monday. Fuh.But it aint stop there. A written agreement shall do to really tie him down. Yeah, we signed those documents.

A good experience for me. Thanks to my Naem for helping me and also not forgetting my angels...for the impromptu trip to Anis's house. U gurls surely make feel better that day.

Lesson learnt. Just extra careful...and do not call your boyfriend when everything is settled. He will be devastated because as if we do not need him. Haha.

..:: Chori Chori Chupke Chupke::..

2010-01-14T23:14:00.003+08:00

Terkejut dengan tajuk posting?(sebab tatkala menaip, di TV sedang mempertontonkan filem ini di Saluran 108 ZEE.) Ye, terkadang saya ada soft spot on Hindi songs.

What is your favourite all time Hindi songs/film?

Like I said above, I do watch Hindi movies. Tetapi tika dan saat zaman kegemilangan Kuch Kuch Hota Hai dan yang sewaktu dengannya. Oh sangat lah femes filem itu, namun aku cuma tgk di cd sahaja, mengadap laptop/desktop member di Kolej Delima which intriques myself to list down some:

First, I like the song entitled, Dulhania Dilwale Le Jeyenge. (Maafkan sekiranya ada kesilapan ejaan ya). Ala..lagu yang starting dia... "Tujhe Dekha Tu Ye Janaa Sanaam..." Haha. Kisah di sebalik lagu ialah saya menerima hadiah dari seorang sahabat lelaki, sebiji bekas krim rambut yang telah habis, yang di isi dengan sehelai kertas yang dilipat kemas yang ditulis lirik PENUH lagu tersebut bertulisan TANGAN pada zaman di MRSM. Adakah dia admirer saya? Tidak sama sekali, kerana hadiah tersebut merupakan hadiah pertukaran antara classmate. Mamat yang kini seorang Doktor di Seremban dan mempunyai nama hampir sama dengan nama gelaran saya di kalangan keluarga, telah terlupa untuk membeli hadiah, lalu memandangkan dia tgh angau dgn lagu itu, dia pun kasi lagu tuh kat saya. Heh. Mana ntah kertas tuh. Nasib baik lagu bes. But somehow few weeks after that dia tetap beli hadiah..which is the ship in the bottle gift. Sentimental gak mamat tuh.

Second, I soooOO in love with the movie entitled Mann, heroin Manisha Koirala, hero Aamir Khan. Lagu yang sedap, jalan cerita yang witty dan touching..and the dress worn by Manisha is so lovely. Sesuai pada zaman itu. I even have bought a sari material and then asked my tailor to sew just like in the movie but with lil Malay touch ie Kebarung instead of Punjabi suit. My green kebarung..

Third,the movie entitled Phil Bir Dil Hai Hindustani. Hero Shah Rukh Khan, heroin Madhuri Dixit.Ok masa ini, zaman masih tiada lagi CD, so saya telah paksa ayah untuk membeli VCR. Kerana masa itu zaman kejatuhan Anwar dan dengar citer this muvie ada sedikit resemblance tentang kes Anwar. Ntah la...in general je kot. I still have it back in Muar. Nak pinjam?

Fourth, Mohabbatein. Filem nih baru la jugak, so dah ada CD. What makes me still remember about this movie is about me and fellow friends back in Kolej. Tengok 3 cd back to back tahap tak ada benti langsung sehingga lambat solat maghrib....punya la sanggup..pada hal boleh je pause kejap. Ntah pa per. I still remember masa tuh ada Lizawatie Awang, Abot, Syuk... I think Adik..Anoy.. Zaman di Kolej Delima. Hihi.

There are few other Hindi films..but the above are the one that I will always remember the story behind each Hindi songs/films. Having to adore a film/song is not about the masterpiece in particular but what lies beneath each and every film/song in disguise.

Muah...mere tum sey pyar kerteho..all of you.

..:: My Hero, My Leader, My Father::..

2010-01-09T13:35:00.004+08:00

The family is a haven in a heartless world. ~Attributed to Christopher Lasch

Kepada pembaca tegar blog ini, pasti sudah tahu tentang kondisi ayah saya. Seorang pesakit kanser hati, angin akhmar, prostat serta batu di dalam pundi kencing. Sakit angin ahmar bermula Mac 2008. Tatkala ayah mendapatkan rawatan bagi angin ahmarnya yang kedua,ayah didiagnos sakit kanser hati tahap 4 beberapa bulan selepas itu. Tahap paling kritikal. Suatu dugaan buat dia serta kami sekeluarga.

Sekadar suatu perkongsian, alhamdulillah berkat doa semua serta usaha yang tidak putus dan paling penting kesabaran dan tidak putus asa kami sekeluarga terutama Ibu..ayah kini di dalam proses pemulihan.

Rentetan sakit dan pemulihan ayah, untuk kansernya, ayah kena rawatan radiologi untuk lebih 5 kali. Ayah terpaksa menanggung seumur hidup untuk rawatan ubat darah tinggi serta ubat sawan. Kerana sakit prostatnya, ayah terpaksa memakai salur beserta beg kencing sejak dia dimasukkan ke hospital dari Mac 2008. Disebabkan telah lebih setahun memakai salur tersebut, pundi kencing ayah telah dikesan terdapat batu. Lagi, ayah ada katarak di mata kanan. Mendapatkan rawatan chemo sangat tiresome, ditambah ayah di"tambat" dengan beg kencing dan penglihatan yang kabur. Ayah ada juga satu penyakit yang dihidapi dari kecil, iaitu sakit pergerakan saraf tanpa sedar, a habit yang getting worse day to day. Pergerakan yang lambat atau luar kawal yang seperti pesakit Parkinson namun masih tiada cara untuk diubati. Sesiapa yang pernah bersama ayah dalam jangkamasa yang lama pasti tahu sakit yang mana.

Rawatan chemo masih diteruskan. Untuk rawatan prostat, pundi kencing dan mata, senarai nya masya Allah panjang. Sebelum ayah dibedah, badan ayah perlu kuat ditambah ayah pernah kena stroke, so sebarang pembedahan hanya boleh dibuat sekurang-kurangnya 6 bulan selepas stroke ayah atas nasihat doktor.

Bagi kanser hati ayah, dari pembengkakan sebesar 14.8x10.4cm telah mengecil sehingga 1.5cm2, rawatan chemo sebanyak 6 kali dalam masa setahun lebih. Dengan bantuan saudara-mara yang banyak memberikan maklumat tentang do's and dont's bagi pesakit kanser serta pembacaan kami adik-beradik, ayah telah mengalami perubahan yang sangat drastik dari segi pemakanannya. Semuanya harus organik dan lebih bersifat alkali, tiada lagi ayam, daging dan makanan laut untuk ayah. Hanya sayur-sayuran dan buah-buahan serta ikan salmon atau senangin untuk sumber protein ayah. Kedengaran terseksa kan? But for his own good, ayah follow je. Ayah pernah hampir putus asa apabila dia terpaksa chemo lebih dari 5 kali. Dah la makanan dicatu dan terlalu dijaga, duit banyak dihabiskan dengan supplemen alternatif, hasilnya tak nampak...tapi alhamdulillah apabila doktor memberitahu bahawa terdapat perubahan positif, reaksi ayah sangat jelas gembira dan bersyukur.

Operation ayah untuk mata dah berjaya dibuat selepas chemo ayah yang keenam. Dan operation untuk prostat dan pundi kencing selepas ayah mengetahui keputusan CT Scan yang membawa berita gembira di atas. Hasil dari pemakanan ayah yang dijaga, badan ayah sangat fit untuk operation dan ayah tidak mengalami simptom post pembedahan yang kronik. Kedua-dua pembedahan adalah FPP. Full Payment Patient di Selayang Govt Hospital. Rawatan berbayar bagi wad kelas pertama, selesa dan paling penting dibedah lebih awal dari jangkaan kerana berbayar seperti hospital swasta. Its not that expensive mind you compared to the real private hospital.

Kanser getting ok, last chemo this 13th Jan 2010...penglihatan yang lebih baik...serta tiada lagi beg kencing yang mengganggu hidup ayah...... Dad looks happier than before. Ibu pula..pengorbanan selama hampir 2 tahun banyak menguji dan mengajar Ibu. Kami adik beradik..belajar banyak mengenai kesusahan, kesabaran dan perhubungan sesama manusia.
bersyukur kepadaNya dan berdoa agar segalanya akan menjadi lebih baik sepanjang tahun ini dan selamanya. Paling penting susah dan senang dihadapi bersama-sama dalam satu keluarga. Amin.

When you look at your life, the greatest happinesses are family happinesses. ~Joyce Brothers

...:: Kembali ke Sekolah::..

2010-01-07T13:17:00.001+08:00

I am back to school honey!!!! Oh in UiTM, we used the term "school" instead of faculty. So, justified kan its back to school.

Registered on the 27th December 2009. Dapat timetable and walla! Only 3 subjects per semester..which means 3 days a week and absolutely lots of day-leisure for me because the class only starts at 6.30pm till 9.30pm. (Semoga aku score gila2.Amin)

My subjects for this semester will be Malaysian Patent and Trade Mark Law, Legal Research Methodology and Malaysian Copyright and Design Laws. Hm. Totally dry subjects. Boleh muntah kalau tak betul-betul.

Kelas dah mula. Lots of reading needs to be done. Suka tak? Yey! (Saya sangat perlukan aura positif, so ayat positif perlu sentiasa ditulis dan diamalkan kerna setiap kata,penulisan serta pemikiran yang kita buat adalah suatu doa buat kita,bukankah?)

:: Movie Blogging::

2010-01-01T01:58:00.003+08:00

MualafWatched with Marliza during Xmas.

3 words. Inspiring. Impressed. Puzzled.

Inspired to read and know in depth the tafsir of the Holy Quran. Betapa kurangnya ilmu Al-Quran di dalam dadaku.
Impressive scriptwriting. With so much sensitive things been thrown inside yet it is still beautifully scripted.
Puzzled with the ending. Was it meant to be like that for us to end it in our own way? Or they are planning to do the sequel..

Avatar
Watched with my sis,BIL and BIL's sister at the eve of 2010.

1 word. Beautiful.

The jungle is like a fairy tale place..heaven on earth. The creature though it looks weird but still, beautifully created. I love the part when the hair connects with the Ikran or the so-called horse. Its worth your ticket to watch over and over again. Set aside any illogical part, you will love it so so much. I know cos I enjoyed it to bits. The story makes you to love your nature more than anything and have faith in your beliefs.

Teruskanlah - Agnes Monica

2010-01-01T01:47:00.001+08:00

Pernahkah kau bicara
Tapi tak di dengar
Tak di anggap
Sama sekali..

Pernahkan kau tak salah
Tapi disalahkan
Tak di beri
Kesempatan

Reff :
Kuhidup dengan siapa
Ku tak tau kau siapa
Kau kekasihku tapi
Orang lain bagiku

Kau dengan dirimu saja
Kau dengan duniamu saja
Teruskan lah.. Teruskan lah
Kau begitu

Kau tak butuh diriku
Aku patung bagimu
Cinta buta
Kebutuhan mu

Back to reff.

Hoo.. Hooo

Kau dengan dirimu saja
Kau dengan duniamu saja
Teruskan lah.. Teruskan lah
Kau.. kau begitu

Teruskan lah... teruskan lah..

This song is the resemblance of my relationship with my beau. Its hard. Im not sure for how long I can cope with it. Or shall never.

..::2010::..

2010-01-01T00:55:00.004+08:00

Any new resolution?

Jap...let me refresh myself with my 2009 resolution. [Posted 1.1.2009]

1. To improve my English. My english sucks sebenarnya.
(Its an ongoing process and I am still learning. I am thankful that I score quite high for my IELTS especially for speaking. Good job Mardiah!)

2. To avoid using extra credit cards
(For this I only limit myself to use only one card. Succeed.Alhamdulillah)

3. To avoid spending money on leisure activities.
(Gosh.May I ask myself to define "leisure"?.Haha. I did my saving for the borneo trip but somehow I spent more than I saved.)

4. To eat healthily, avoid carcinogen foods, insya allah jadi semi-vegetarian.
(I hope to continue for the rest of my life and not on yearly basis.)

5. To be more environmentalist ie using own ware for lunch instead of polistrin.
( Sorry mother earth, I am a bad homo sapiens. I still use the polistrine. How ley?)

6. To get married (if not, aku sambung belajar..)
[I think its like a quarter of my step heading towards that but somehow the passion of pursuing my study is totally above all. Alhamdulillah my wish has been granted. I am now a student cum a scholar of UiTM and soon to become an academician]

So I need my 2010 resolution.

1. To finish my study with flying colours.

Tu je. Ye la...kalau tak kena bayar RM100,000.00 kang kat UiTM..

(Contoh seorang pelajar yang menunggu untuk memenuhkan ilmu di dada. But..with some cash in her hands? haha. Sesungguhnya imej di atas tiada kaitan dengan sesiapa sama ada masih hidup attau telah meninggal dunia.)

..Settling Down..

2009-12-24T18:17:00.003+08:00

I need to settle down with all my things and what not from JB to Shah Alam and also from Tmn Melawati to Shah Alam as well. From being an employee to a student. From comfortably stay with my aunty in her cosy house back in Uda, to 5 flight of stairs to climb to my cutie rented house.

I need few more days to settle everything and then starts working on with all my pending projects .. he he he. Even if Im back in Shah Alam, the schedule is still the same especially when it involves my dad's appointment with the doctor and his other treatment.

I felt blissful. Oh ya, having to "settle down" with the significant other is not really in my picture at the moment. Bersabar lah wahai hati.

Currently helping my colleague for the MPUU meeting in JB. Boleh lah tolong sesikit. My ultimate last meeting la katakan.

Will post later with all the piccies, only for the record of this blog.

Au revoir.

..Akhirnya..

2009-12-18T17:10:00.000+08:00

Sahabat-sahabat sekalian, I am no longer working in UTM. Notis memang belum sampai tapi sebab beta mempunyai cuti yang banyak, beta HABISKAN lah cuti tuh...

Pretty hectic bila dah nak benti. Agreements and MoU's bertalu-talu masuk dalam inbox emel aku. Adoi...

But all in all.. things need to be stopped jugak. Notis serahan tugas dah diserahkan pada bos. I am now alone in the office during Awal Muharam. Yep, baru nak kemas. bukan pe..tak nak nampak gak beria nak keluar.

Currently waiting to transfer my file. From the huge lappy to my missed laptop. Banyak tangan dah pakai lappy aku, now its my turn pulak..sirih pulang ke gagang...

Sangat secara kebetulan, my last day is actually hari akhir tahun hijrah. Betapa ironic kan. Aku benar2 sedang menuju ke arah penghijrahan tuh. Well talk about MOVING..aduh..packed and repacked and packed.. sangat lah menyusahkan. Rasa nak clone lagi 2 Mardiah Hayati lah. Boleh tak? Sebab kalau nak soh org lain yg buat repacking..sure diorang tak tahu...aku je yg patutnya tahu.. so if I have 3 of myself..things can be easily done in just one time. Heh. Silly me lah.

Ok. File transfered. Chiow

“Hanging By A Moment”

2009-12-07T17:29:00.003+08:00

I'm desperate for changing
I'm starving for truth
I'm closer to where I’ve started
I'm chasing after you

I'm falling even more in love with you
Letting go of all I've held onto
I'm standing here until you make me move
I'm hanging by a moment here with you

Forgetting all I'm lacking
Completely incomplete
I'll take your invitation
You take all of me

Now.. I'm falling even more in love with you
Letting go of all I've held onto
I'm standing here until you make me move
I'm hanging by a moment here with you

I'm living for the only thing I know
I'm running and not quite sure where to go
And I don't know what I'm diving into
Just hanging by a moment here with you

There's nothing else to lose
There's nothing ELSE to find
There's nothing in the world
That could change my mind
There is nothing else…
There is nothing else…
There is nothing else

Desperate for changing
Starving for truth
Closer to where I’ve started
Chasing after you

I'm falling even more in love with you
Letting go of all I've held onto
I'm standing here until you make me move
I'm hanging by a moment here with you

I'm living for the only thing i know
I'm running and not quite sure where to go
And I don't know what I'm diving into
Just hanging by a moment here with you

Just hanging by a moment
(here with you)
Hanging by a moment…
(here with you)
Hanging by a moment...
(here with you)
Hanging by a moment here with you...

...........

..:: Aku Wanita Biasa::.. (Lagu Tema Bulan ini untuk Gua dan Kak Fiza)

2009-12-04T16:04:00.001+08:00

Aku ini wanita biasa
Bisa sakit luka karena cinta
Dingin sepi kerap menyapa
Air mata jatuh lukisan raga

Kadang ku kuat setegar karang
Kadang ku rapuh lemah liar merana

[chorus1]
Maafkan aku bila hasratku keliru
Sulut gairah jiwamu
Ku yang dosakan cinta kekasih

Maafkan aku bila hasratku keliru
Sulut gairah jiwamu
Ku yang dosakan cinta kekasih hatiku

Kekasih hatiku maafkan aku
Aku wanita biasa

Dingin sepi kerap menyapa
Air mata jatuh lukisan raga

Kadang ku kuat setegar karang
Kadang ku rapuh lemah liar merana

[chorus2]
Maafkan aku bila hasratku keliru
Sulut gairah jiwamu
Ku yang dosakan cinta kekasih

Maafkan aku bila hasratku keliru
Sulut gairah jiwamu
Ku yang dosakan cinta kekasih
Hatiku… maafkan aku..

..:: Instinct wise::..

2009-11-30T12:03:00.000+08:00

Kengkadang geram pun ada. Malas nak layan..hati tak sampai hati. Bukan sengaja nak menyibuk hatta nak mementingkan diri sendiri. Bila hati dah ada wave tersendiri, ada musabab nya bila yours truly tanya and ajak berjuta kali. Knowing my truly, dia mudah naik darah bila sesuatu perkara asik di ulang. Somehow, untuk kali ini, tidak pula..tak reti2 ke fikir sejenak ada sesuatu di sebaliknya?

Haish...I guess...when things did not goes well..still theres always something in disguise. I wish he had the chance again and be nearer to me. Amin.

..:: Di angin lalu::..

2009-11-23T09:07:00.002+08:00

Gosh, serius banyak benda nak updet dalam blog nih tapi tak terupdate. I know, not many read my blog. Heck. This blog pun is for me to track my life. Sometimes, we tends to forget things. Sebab tuh kengkadang when I wrote sumthing that I want to write just for the sake of my record and not for public to know the details of it, so ader lah tendency to disguise things..however it will end up for myself when I read the post, to forget what was actually hidden in that post. Muahahaha. Mcm "kel" pula.

Since the last long post, I would really wanna share here our open house gathering during Hari Raya which shall be my last makan2 at Uda for my friends. Then, my absolutely awesome trip to Borneo, where I suffer terrible sunburnt on my face. After that, my renions with my schoolmates both Convent and MRSM Jasin. 10 years no joke man...some even more than that.

Im in the midst of serah kerja to my department. Ill be quitting UTM in December 2009. Alhamdulillah dah dapat offer in UiTM for Masters in Intellectual Property and Ill be registering on the 27th December 2009. Gradually, fellow colleuges have been informed of my non-existants in UTM soon.

My transfer to Shah Alam will be absolutely incur cost. Sesiapa tolong beri bantuan kewangan sket yer kat Mardiah ni. Semakin mahu pindah, semakin selalu jumpa my beau which we seldom do during our courting moments. *sila muntah hijau. Justified la kan sebab jap lagi dah nak kena PJJ. Aku tak tahu for this time it will work or not. *sigh*.

Ok. done.

..:: sapu laman ::..

2009-11-19T09:53:00.001+08:00

Jap eh... sangat busy sebelum menyerahkan sebarang kerja.

..Gugu Gaga AKu..

2009-10-20T06:37:00.000+08:00

Serius macam dah lama tak blog. Wireless kat rumah selalu jadi tukun. Bayar sebulan RM98.huhu terasa rugi tapi tak pe lah, sekurang-kurangnya hati tak sakit kalau tetiba nak guna akan sentiasa ada. Haha. Just like what my beau always called me..I am so the Tengku Sharifah Mardiah Hayati. Heh.

Current update, I was bombarded with few issues with regard to my resignation letter. Aduhai..sehingga aku jadi seorang yang tak ada pendirian. Banyak betul benda yang aku take into consideration sehingga lupa pada niat asal aku sejak di bangku Uni yang aku selalu rosakkan.

Thanks to fwens yang banyak membantu aku dalam membuat keputusan. Aku redha dengan keputusan aku. What ever happens in future its my onus. Please..jangan salahkan keputusan yang aku buat. Allah knows whats the best for me and I just follow my instincts. Tak kisah lah kalau aku kena tempuh onak ranjau, yang penting rezeki Dia sentiasa luas untuk makhlukNya.

Enuff said. I pray that things will go smooth. Tolong doakan saya juga ya kawan-kawan. That will be my career. My significant other pulak..erm..umm.er.. ntah la. I guess I have to face another PJJ with him. PJJ-Perhubungan Jarak Jauh or LDR-Long Distance Relationship. Aduhai..

Despite all above, my cant-wait moment is my trip to Borneo. Hati ini melonjak2..tapi hep! tak leh tunjuk..hehe. Semoga selamat pergi dan balik. Next year..Japan perhaps shaf? haha

..:: Aura::..

2009-10-13T08:45:00.000+08:00

Sungguh bosan dengan semua benda. Semakin hampir aku nak meninggalkan bumi JB, semakin banyak perkara yang aku kena settlekan. Tidak tertekan cuma takut semua benda tak terkejar. Or worse part...yang dikejar tak dapat, yang dikendong berciciran. I just want to move forward. Period.

..:: Beauty and the Beast::..

2009-10-01T09:57:00.007+08:00

I have been receiving good feedbacks about my facial skin lately. Alhamdulillah.. Its not a day job I tell you. It took me years. Especially when I had a really major break outs in 2007. Sila tgk sepuanya jerawat ku yang kelihatan..huhuhu horror...

I did post in this blog that I signed myself in a cosmetic saloon, 12 times for facial treatment. It cost me thousands and the result was depressing. So, I decide to revert to my Uni regime to heal my acne. That is.. DALACIN T. Use it after you wash your face using a facial wash.

With basic skin care...Nivea Visage Facial Wash and Toner. (But I used my Dalacin T as my toner when I have breakouts)

Then, Oil Of Ulay Total Effects as my mosturiser. I choose the SPF 25.

Frankly, having those chemicals on your face helps only approx 25% of your skin, the rest is depending on your blood circulation and what you eat.

I did consume DCL product for my skin. It works well for me, but lately dah malas nak makan sebab mahal. Haha. However, the products makes my face like Im blushing all the time. (Sila rujuk saya kalau nak beli eh eh)

Then I decide to look some product which has a natural effect on me. Apatah lagi bila kulit sudah mula ok, decide to buy make-up products. Keyword NATURAL. Mana lagi? Bodyshop lah.

So, currently, Im using this product to decrease my pores.. Dah masuk 2 botol and I really recommend this product. Costly tapi fyi, a small bottle like this can last about 6-8 months, depending on ur usage la. BODYSHOP SEAWEED PORE PERFECTOR.

And this as my foundation...BODYSHOP MINERALS LOOSE POWDER FOUNDATION

And also this to cover my shining-shining face..(elak muka minyak masa pakai mekap lah). MATTE IT BODYSHOP. Hanya boleh didapati di Sabah dan Sarawak. Harap maklum.

Hmm agak2 sayang nak guna produk Bodyshop, ada this one produk from SYAHIRAH pun elok juga. Makes your face even once u wear it, it can be your foundation. Tapi jangan sapu banyak-banyak sebab nanti dah jadi tak natural and worse if people starts to wonder whether you are for real a human or not.

Oh...di bawah hasil daripada semua bahan-bahan kimia yang tersenarai di atas... huhuhuu

Okeh. Itu sahaja. Tengah pening-pening. Mungkin sebab kesan gempa bumi. Semakin hampir Dia mengingati kita tentang Hari Kiamat..

..:: Tenang-tenang::..

2009-09-25T08:23:00.005+08:00

Semalam Celcom bengong. Traffic due to 5 times of Smses sent by fellow users. Heh. Sungguh cepat teknologi telefon nih. Computer dah leh convert dalam Telefon. Wahh. Semoga di kala aku meningkat semakin dewasa I wont let myself to be left behind from any canggih manggih gadget ever created in future.

Wahai pengguna Celcom, tenang kah anda pada situasi semalam? Saya? Tenang-tenang aja. Siap masak makaroni bakar dengan penuh lemah gemalai. Dok rumah sengsorang, makan pun ciput. Memandangkan nak call out tak leh, so tak da rezeki lah untuk sesiapa yang aku terdetik nak berkongsi masakan yang dah berzaman aku tak buat.

Its a blessing yesterday. I can at least indulge myself..being myself last night. Not thinking too much...just looking forward and getting ready for any circumstances that I shall face soon. Whats more important is that for any decision that I made, for what ever reason that I give there shall be no turning back for me.

Ok..this wiken mahu ke kuala lumpur...mahu lepak2 dengan rakan kenalan. kalau sempat, akan beraya di rumah member yang dah kawin (supaya leh rasa masakan derang) tapi itu pun selepas habis beraya rumah sanak saudara.

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee..................................

..:: Serabut::..

2009-09-24T01:05:00.005+08:00

(http://www.flickr.com/photos/7643981@N08/440634803/)

Balik kerja tadi, tertido dari petang, sedar-sedar dah maghrib. Kekenyangan makan nasi ayam bujang (sebab gua dok sorang kat rumah,semua gi beraya). Terkejut dok bila semua gelap. Lupa pasang lampu sesiap. Kelam kabut pasang lampu luar dalam mamai. Dan dalam mamai jugak aku rasa aku mimpi dah sembahyang maghrib. Terjaga balik dari tido jam 10pm.

Kepala serabut. My weakness. Terlalu banyak berfikir, menjadikan aku kurang fokus which is which. It cracks my head. Too personal to pour in this blog. I just hope that he will understand. Please makes this thing as easy as it can be. PLEASE.....

On the other note, I just cant wait for my Sabah trip with my MRSM frens (termasuk sahabat di Sarawak)..sangat sangat teruja. The trip this time is to spend lavishly for the travelling, food and accomodation. No more shopping for my ownself...sesapa nak kirim sila kirim uangnya termasuk kos baggage AirAsia k sekiranya melebihi 5 kg.(itupun kalau kitorang decide utk gi shopping la....)

..: Salam Aidilfitri ::..

2009-09-21T11:01:00.003+08:00

"Balik kampung..hoo hoo hoo balik kampung.."

Sila refer posting saya bertarikh 24 Ogos yang lepas. Betapa saya sangat sakit hati apabila lagu raya berkumandang di awal Ramadhan. So when it was 3-4 days before Eid, Ill put it as an exception..altho still,at the same time, Im sad that the month full of His blessings has ended..Semoga saya berpeluang menikmatinya di tahun hadapan. Amin.

Ramai dah mula bercuti bermula hari Jumaat. Saya? Hanya ngelat 20 minit awal pada hari Jumaat tuh. (Dengan izin bos tau!). Telah plan dengan my best friend, Adam to go back to our own hometown Saturday morning. Oleh itu, saya punya banyak masa for my last minit shopping. The only thing that I havent buy is a pair of new shoes. Mahu yang simple but comfy, and suits in most of any occasions.

My beau asked me out and we went to AEON Tebrau. Finally, bought a pair of Crocs shoes. Hmm..but I think I still need a pair of heels la. Salvatore Ferragamo? Haha. My beau bought a pair of slacks for his dad. Going out with him makes me feel that I have become somebody else which is not good for me. Or did he want me to become someone that he expected me to be? That nite was not a really good date. Im stubborn I shall say. Haishh...

(somehow I think I need to buy a new sunglass to fit my button nose.haha. Balik kampung mood with Adam)

Went back to Muar with Adam, my childhood friend. But my pitstop is at his house first in BP. Dolu ye lah dia duduk Muar. Skang bila dia dah duduk Batu Pahat, Im left driving alone for another 45 minutes to Muar. Apa2 pun syok gak bila balik kampung dengan dia, sebab terasa sikit nak balik beraya. (walaupun both of us actually almost every weekend balik kampung.Haha)

Hari Raya adalah hari kemenangan umat Islam setelah sebulan berpuasa di bulan Ramadhan. Buat kami sekeluarga merupakan hari kesyukuran kerana ayah masih ada bersama-sama dengan kami di hari raya kali ini. Alhamdulilah walaupun ada sang doktor pernah bagi statement yang sakit ayah ni 70-80% akan hidup dalam tempoh 7-8 bulan, but all of us stay strong and have faith that he shall be within the 20-30% whom shall survive.

Im enjoying my raya to bits by lepaking at home. Balik kampung mak kejap then lepak kat depan tv sahaja. Menghabiskan makanan yang ada.Haha. Sebenarnya banyak benda nak kena settle once I get back to my office on WEDNESDAY. Ye..saya tak cuti raya. So, ala kadar je la beraya.

### Indecisive nak pergi ke tidak marhaban keluarga my beau. Currently baru lepas perang mulut dengan dia..somehow I felt that its hard for me to understand him. Sebab dia tua sangat kah?

..:: Things to settle ::..

2009-09-16T11:38:00.001+08:00

Settle satu perkara yang selama ini terlalu membelenggu kepala aku. Finally, I have tendered my resignation letter and the three months notice shall effectively starts on the 1st of November 2009. Insya allah sambung belajar pada end of December.

"Eh, kan tak tamat lagi notis tuh?"
Well, cuti tahunan aku bila aku semak lagi 36 hari, so the whole months of January 2010 aku akan ambil cuti walhal aku sedang sambung belajar.

"Dah tuh, hantar lah notis Oktober, then bulan 12 leh cuti sebulan huya huyeh!"
Hmm..bebanan tugas di UTM. Memang telah terdetik untuk hantar notis mulai 1 Oktober, but when I think that there will be not much left to update all my works..I think it would be so mean if I just leave the office just like that. I still love my office!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ingat senang ke nak buat keputusan ini? Tanyalah sahabat baik ku ..termasuk my kak fiza and shaf..betapa indecisive nya aku tatkala nak buat apa-apa keputusan. Baik dari mula nak isi borang biasiswa sehingga tarikh notis letak jawatan. Istikharah pun sudah banyak kali dan pada tarikh keramat iaitu hari ini, aku telah memulakan langkah pertama ku ie berkeputusan bahawa akan aku teruskan perjuangan untuk berubah haluan dari menjadi Pegawai Pentadbir kepada pelajar dan seterusnya pensyarah di tempat belajar ku dahulu....

Most of my colluegues have yet to know about my resignation. Please..let it be that way. Let me think of the fact that I still have to finish and update my work here..instead of anxiously waiting to be freed from this office. And frankly, the more people knows that Im going away..the deeper my sadness shall be to leave this office.

What touched me deeply today is when my boss even if he knows that my existence is not going to be that long (approx 2 months), he still approved my annual leave for my vacation to Sabah Sarawak this October. Alhamdulillah maybe because I used the reason that I did not take any leave for Hari Raya.

I guess there be lots and lots of things need to be settle..Semoga aku dapat hadapi dengan tenang. Amin.

..:: 27 years of life::..

2009-09-09T20:47:00.004+08:00

September, the month of celebration. 11.31am, 8th of September 1982, a cute but asthmatic baby gurl was born. Now, she is already 27 years old, still single and currently has a vague status of availability.

Fellow officemates celebrates her day as early as 4th of September 2009, since everybody is in the office. She felt so happy when she opened the gifts. Two of her wishlists have been materialised! Yey!

The day before her birthday, she received another one of her wishlists, a box of 25 cutey cupcakes with red, black and white theme. Nice! On the eve of her birthday, she went to an Indian wedding with her beau dan berbuka di tgh jalan sharing the cupcakes.

She was totally flattered when her beau remembers her birthday and gave her a really surprise birthday gift. Apa taknya, she received a pair of woman's accessory which for her shall be the last thing that she would wanna wear. Because the accessories involve great risk and pain.Erk.. Anyway, she still loves it to bits because she loves surprises.hihi.

When the clock struck 12am, 8th September 2009, strings of sms and messages in FB with birthday wishes received in her Inbox. Totally thankful with all the doas and wishes.

The bufday gurl then indulge herself by taking leave and went to a place where she can find all the raya items with very considerate price. Half of her day spent at that place, and she really satisfied with her hasil tangkapan.hikhik.

On her way back after the restless spree, she received another surprise from her boss. Haishh..another challenge for me before I proceed with my dream. Oh well, life goes on....

The bufday gurl had a good dinner with her UiTM friends. Seronok seronok seronok sehingga terleka pada sesuatu.hikhik. Thanks angels, Daud and Amy..you make two of my wishlist come true ie lots of cupcakes and the great time spent for dinner.

She thought that her birth day ends after the dinner..but NO..she bravely forced herself to go through some pain..huhu. Ok lah tuh at least she will remember her 27th birth date. Thanks to elin sebab belanja the piercing.

Having a year older..but still young at heart. Frankly she felt that she needs to maintain her nottiness and playfulness but yet she pray that she'll have deep patience and mature way of thinking for any obstacles that she will encounter in future. Pray hard that her prayers will come true..Amin..

Many thanks to all, and Him...for the great day..

..:: Adam dan Hawa::..

2009-09-01T16:00:00.005+08:00

Sempurna sangat kah kita, sehingga mahukan semuanya serba sempurna?

Hebat sangat kah kita, apabila kehebatan kita tidak ditandingi?

Siapa kita untuk membenci sesama sendiri, sedang Dia Maha Pengampun pada makhlukNya.

Saya cuba untuk tidak terdetik melahirkan sifat kebencian saya pada mana-mana makhluk di muka bumi Allah. Kerana saya sedar saya pun hanya insan kerdil yang mengharapkan ehsan dari RahmatNya.

Cuma hati saya hancur apabila mengetahui perkara-perkara yang sedih terutama ianya melibatkan penganiayaan pada wanita. Penganiayaan bukan bererti hanya berbentuk fizikal, malah mental dan juga hati dan perasaan. Kenapa perlu hati dan perasaan dipermainkan hanya untuk kepuasan sendiri? Apa sebenarnya yang anda inginkan dari seorang wanita dalam kehidupan yang sementara ini?

Anda mengharapkan seorang wanita, isteri dan ibu persis Saidatina Khadijah RA, namun adakah akhlak anda sesempurna Rasulullah SAW? Kehidupan ini perlu saling lengkap melengkapi, tapi adakah benar apabila anda hanya menuding jari menyalahkan orang lain dan tidak mengaku kelemahan sendiri. Sekiranya si dia menerima kelemahan anda, tidakkah anda patut menerima kelemahan dia juga?

Jauhkan diri anda diibarat tin kosong, yang apabila diketuk bunyinya masya allah kuat namun isinya tiada. Penuhilah dada dengan ilmu. Ilmu agama untuk membimbing keluarga anda termasuk bakal khalifah di muka bumi. Jadilah pemimpin yang memimpin dan menarik mereka disekelilingmu ke jalan yang benar, walaupun mereka pernah tergelincir dari landasan yang sebenar. Anda sepatutnya menjadikan diri anda sebagai pelindung bagi mereka yang memerlukan, dan bukannya mengambil kesempatan di setiap kebaikan yang pernah anda lakukan. Kelemahan anda bukan satu sebab untuk anda bersikap ego pada yang lain dan nauzubillah untuk menyakiti mereka yang lemah.

Saya bukan feminist yang membabi buta melindungi hak wanita. Kita semua tidak sempurna, setiap orang ada kisah silam, ada cacat-cela dan ada juga kelakuan yang tidak disukai ramai. Perlukah api berlawan dengan api? Sedalam mana pun kesabaran seorang wanita, pasti akan tewas apabila ujian yang dihadapi tidak tertanggung. Sejahat mana pun seorang wanita, pasti boleh dilentur dan dilembutkan hatinya ke jalan yang benar.

Pening dengan persoalan saya? Biarlah, ini posting saya yang agak beremosi. Saya tidak mampu mengubah dunia agar lebih adil sesama kaum ADAM dan HAWA. Tapi selemah-lemahnya iman, saya hanya mampu berdoa agar orang yang dianiayai akan termakbul doanya dan orang yang menganiaya akan segera insaf dan kembali ke pangkal jalan. Maaf andai ada yang terasa hati. Amin...Saya hanya insan biasa yang makan gaji.

..:: Lists::..

2009-08-27T12:32:00.002+08:00

(During my 25th birthday dan harap maklum kanak-kanak itu adalah anak bos saya)

I am reaching 27 next month. I was supposed to be ready to get married 2 years back..but it didnt happen when I was 25 and so I told myself that I will make myself ready when I reach 27..yikes my 26th year is going to its end! To date, the marriage thing is yet to be materialized because I am still single and available. Masih lah available selagi tiada siapa yang seriously masuk meminang kan?Tak kisah lah walaupun in my previous posting I wrote about my beau or bf or BFF or any initials that gives the connotations that Im seeing someone, that doesnt means that I am not available.Er...umur 27 is to get ready je bukannya mati-mati kena kahwin gak. Tapi kalau dah jodoh..anytime can do. hihi.

For me, from my previous experience, though u actually seeing someone special, but that doesnt assure you that he or she is going to be your life partner. So embrace yourself for being single and do not restrict yourself with the society because of the reason that you are stuck for having "seeing someone". However, do remember the three R's.

Respect for self, Respect for other's and Responsiblity for all your actions. Self-explanatory.

So for my 27th birthday, I wish...

1) to have lots and lotsa cupcakes during that day. I think I may be able to enjoy all of it within a day. *wink.

2) to have a blue tooth handsfree for my cellphones. (My officemates dah survey-survey kan for me..ngee)

3) to have a good dinner with all my good friends and families.

4) to have a really good pair of shoes and sandals. Preferably clarks or crocs.

5) to have a nice handbag for office and leisure. Aku kengkadang susah nak pilih handbag so anything you chose I will love it.(mode perasan akan ada orang belikan)

6) to have a nice feminine watch. I bought my BUM watch in 2006 for my 24th birthday, technically from my ex-firmmates during my chambering days. This year I need one new watch that has a feminin character.

7) to have a set of eyeshadows with all colours, preferably branded ones to avoid illegal chemical on my face. (I have no feelings in buying because I know I will not use them, tapi kalau dah ada orang bagi...kenalah guna kan?) Thanks to Shaf 3 years back she posted to me her unused natural colour Bodyshop eyeshadows..I am so use it and heart it!

8) Last but not least... to have a cat with all its facilities..(cage, poop place, etc)Miss my atam@cikenit so much.

Seronok kan kalau dapat semua? Cukup lah 8. Sebab kesemua senarai di atas sering aku inginkan even if its not for my birthday. There's a reason in disguise for each and every lists. Ye lah.. I can only wish.. My beau kata dia dah belikan hadiah awal-awal sebab takut lupa diri bila dah dapat gaji. haha. I doubt he will buy any of those in the lists. We will wait and see ok..because I kinda have the feeling that he will forget my birth date.ngee.

..:: Down side ::..

2009-08-26T08:25:00.001+08:00

My car broke down. The throttle body capult. It cannot ignite and I cant even drive to any workshop to get it fixed. Boy, I am so lucky that one of my officemates is a mechanic. He came to my house for two days in a row to fix it. On the second day, we had to swap cars because my car needs few adjustments. Tak kisah lah asalkan my car is in good hands. Yang pasti I had to drive his car to work..paham-paham lah kereta mekanik, semua benda dia tuka..adalah jugak mati enjin sekali masa aku bawak. Thank god I survived. hehe.

My oh my..I know ayah wanted to pay for the repair but sampai kah hatimu wahai anak? I know the cost will create a really deep hole in my pocket. Ditambah nak kena amik IELTS for the Tenaga Pensyarah Muda requirements which will cost me thousands and macam-macam lagi lah before I finally can breathe to further my studies. Semoga di bulan yang barakah ini Allah kurniakan kemurahan rezeki buat seseorang untuk memudahkan kehidupan seseorang. Amin....

..:: Oh So Random ::..

2009-08-24T13:17:00.003+08:00

1. Kedatangan Ramadhan amat-amat ku nantikan. Sila delete semua aura atau perangai negatif anda dan insert semua perkara yang baik di dalam diri anda. Masa ini lah bonus berganda-ganda yang akan anda dapat. Insya Allah.

2. Tapi saya tak dapat elak nak lahirkan perasaan sedih saya apabila hari pertama ramadhan sudah ada lagu raya berkumandang di corong-corong pasaraya. Sakit hati dan sangat sakit telinga. Sedih sangat bila penghayatan bulan Ramadhan tidak diendahkan dengan sempurna oleh segelintir masyarakat. Kalau Hari Raya yang dikejar..sambut lah dengan hebat gilang gemilang pada Hari Raya Korban nanti 4 hari 4 malam boleh bertukar-tukar baju raya dan berpesta ke rumah sanak saudara. Aidilfitri cuma sehari, hanya untuk merayakan kejayaan setelah berpuasa selama sebulan. Kesimpulannya, kok ye pun nak pasang lagu raya, boleh tak tunggu 4-5 hari sebelum raya? Bagi peluang kita mengalu-alukan bulan Ramadhan dahulu, ok?

3. Saya sedang sibuk. Hanya akan mengangkat telefon bimbit untuk orang tertentu atau tatkala tak sibuk sangat. Tapi encik yang mahu menelefon saya, kalau tak mahu cakap or tak mahu nak fikir bila saya bertanyakan soalan sebab anda juga sedang bekerja sila lah jangan telefon saya. Sabarlah wahai hati kerana saya kena pegang telefon bimbit saya di tgn kiri dan pen untuk buat keja di tangan kanan. Kalau tak di angkat, nanti merajuk. Dah tua pun perlu merajukkah?

Perlukah saya mengeluarkan kata-kata pedas tatkala di bulan yang mulia ini? Andai kata encik merindui suara saya yang manja ini, sila lahirkan perasaan anda dan jangan garang bila saya pula yang banyak tanya. (of course lah saya akan banyak tanya bila lepas saudara cakap hello saudara terus diam..dan dengan selamba saudara membuat kerja saudara, seperti saya adalah rakan sekerja saudara yang sedang menemankan saudara di atas peha saudara tatkala saudara sedang membuat kerja) Apakah?

(gamba di atas dari http://www.flickr.com/photos/trans-formation/259616051/. Amarah ketika berpuasa, tak elok kan? Astaghfirullah)

..:: Ramadhan Yang Dinanti ::..

2009-08-21T23:35:00.001+08:00

Salam Ramadhan buat semua. Ampun dan maaf andai ada salah silap yang pernah saya coretkan di dalam penulisan saya di blog ini. Semoga tahun ini amalan kita adalah yang lebih baik dari tahun-tahun yang sebelumnya. Amin.....

..:: Before Ramadhan ::..

2009-08-21T22:37:00.009+08:00

Did I tell you about my cousin from Paris? She's married to a french guy and has two sons, aged 13 and 19. The four of them, plus with one of her brother in law and a nephew and also 2 of her son's friends. So total, 8 of them slept over at my aunty's house for few days.

I thought that I wont be able to spend time with them since their activities are so packed..Sabah, Perhentian Island (sy sgt jeles!), Cameron Highlands and Kuala Lumpur within their 3 weeks stay. Luckily their departure is in Changi Airport and not KLIA. So during their last days in JB, I took a day leave and ehem.. be their chauffeur. We went shopping in JB, to Plaza Seni, Holiday Plaza, Balai Nusantara, Festive Streets Danga Bay, Angsana.. Well, besides Angsana, even me myself never been to those places. Hihi.

Oh I really really REALLY need to go to Paris.. haha. Tapi bila dah kumpul ribu riban, baik gi Umrah kan? Pakcik yang nget ngot boleh sponsor? haha. Oh, enjoy the photos
(Above pic clockwise: me,nicholas [cousin's nephew], Mak Nah, Hugo [cousin's youngest son], Haris[cousin's eldest son] and Dominique [cousin's brother-in-law] )
(They had their last lunch in Minha. Since its Friday, so they had the chance to taste Mak Nah's yummylicious Beriyani. My beau langkah kanan, he managed to have lunch with us and gives LOTS of his all-rounder information to the mat salleh.hihi. Sila lihat betapa beria dia berbual dengan si botak Nicholas di sebelahnya sebenarnya)

(gaga tak mereka?)

(kegilaan kami di Balai Nusantara dan Angsana. Oh I am so missing Haris and Hugo, they are so well mannered yet cheeky boys)

(Went to UTM and also Rumah Limas Danga Bay..kegilaan kami lagi)

They went to Putrajaya and Perhentian. Klasik bukan gamba pokcik tolong mereka main dam. And also Hugo yang dah besar tapi masih hisap jari.huhu. Oh ya for the first time their lives they wore kain sarong. hihi

(Look at the crystal clear blue water. Masya Allah bila lah aku nak gi Perhentian.Oh ya ada lagi 2 orang kawan Haris. Had the chance to meet them when they arrived in JB early August. The middle photo, the one in black is Vincent and next to him is Pierre Alex. Nice boys.. Oh ya the lady in blue is moi cousin and next to her is her hubby)My cousin's family. Masa untuk advance hari raya ziarah.

The end. I think I shud brush up my French when Im in Shah Alam. Setelah seharian berada di dalam kereta yang dipenuhi bangsa Perancis, mulanya saya pening tapi lama kelamaan er..mcm gila hot tiap kali mamat-mamat ni cakap french. *drool.hihi.

..:: Convocation Stories::..

2009-08-18T13:32:00.004+08:00

Aaah. Untuk kali keenam dan mungkin untuk kali terakhir, aku bertugas di konvokesyen. Tugas aku kena jaga royal box. Ruang khas untuk ahli keluarga Diraja serta Datin-datin, isteri-isteri Pegawai Kanan di Organisasi aku. Senang tapi remeh. Relaks tapi kena sentiasa berhati-hati especially bila melibatkan protokol.

I remembered during my first ever convo was when I was in MRSM Jasin. Ye, semua budak MRSM pasti mengalaminya. Time ni lah semua kapel-kapel bergambar sesama sendiri. However, during that day was actually my WORST TUDUNG DAY and my picture taken when I was receiving the scroll was horrendous. Yeah, I had my geek smile and my not-after-retainer teeth. Haishh. Gambar dengan kapel tentulah ada..n siap kidnap adik Syadidi yang comel untuk bergambar bertiga. Haha. I missed my MRSM geng. Especially epicureans!!!!!!!!!!!!

Next convo was in UiTM for my first degree. Being a really notty-notty gurl, I actually did a PEACE sign when the cameraman took my static picture for the hall to see me and my name in the screen. And worse... I walked at the wrong side of the aisle after receiving the scroll. I still remember Liza Melati was supposed to walk in front of me but instead, (sebab dah selamba lalu tangga VIP dalam hall) other person plak depan aku. Haha. Embarassing but yet...Im smiling. I still remember that four "M"s in geng angel sits together during the convocation, Me, Mardiana, Mardziatun and Marliza. siap ambil gambar the four of us in the hall, classic sey!. For this convo my Tuan Zul was very sporting to wear sedondon with me and to take pictures with me and my family and vice versa. I guess my picture in his camera did intrigue a controversy in his family and thats why one of the reason we had our own separate ways.(or sebab lain zul?)

My last (as for now) convo for my hons degree. I did not wear any dondon with anyone. I did not make any PEACE sign and also walk at the proper way during the processions.(*huarghh...bosan sebab kurang nakal). I tak ambil gamba dengan family sesapa.. BUT I know I really make an effort to have a studio photograph with my ANGELS!!! 9 of us..walaupun Naem dan Jaja tak grad masa tuh but hey.. all of us dah grad our first degree lah. Sweet sangat...

There you have it, my list of convo and insya allah akan ada lagi satu convo soon.Amin.

..:: Movie Post::..

2009-08-16T12:40:00.001+08:00

Its GI JOE bebeh! Its good to have an impromptu plan whenever I wanna watch movie. Last time was SETEM and now GI JOE. Unlike Transformers which I really wanted to watch and frustratedly end up went for few times but in vain due to long que or if not jadi the front seat victim. Knowing that my beau adalah silau,(bila tgk terminator salvation dia dok terkejut2 kat sebelah aku sebab cannot figure out the pictures. Aku yang tak terkejut jd terkejut kat sebelah dia yang kejut-kejut..eh berapa banyak kejut daaaaa) Hence, I dare not again to buy any front seats if he is going to be my movie date.

GI JOE's seat was totally at the back. I thought it should be comfortable but unfortunately it was not. Kena panjangkan leher seperti zirafah untuk melihat keseluruhan skrin, kalau tak sure bahagian subtitle tak nampak.

Anyways, the film is still awesome! Suka apabila diselitkan unsur emosi dan flashback di dalam cerita tuh and not totally action packed. Biasalah unsur-unsur tak logic, dah nama cerita sci-fi. Never watched the cartoons..so I have no say to compare the toons and film. Izinkan saya menyukai watak Duke. He reminds me of someone.

Insiden paling tak leh lupa.

2009-08-11T00:26:00.000+08:00

Pee Incident 1

Sebagai Ucu yang dah lama tak jumpa lil khalifahnya. Dengan baik hati Ucu sanggup menanggung tanggungjawab bagi membawa lil khalifah bersiar-siar serta berlibur ke Shah Alam. Sebenarnya nak gi tgk anak Ana dan bukannya beria bershopping etc.

I am so impressed on how my lil khalifahs behaved at that time especially in the car. They were so excited to chit chat with their stories about this and that in school, at home yada yada and they didnt mind to be buckled up one at the back and Adam been the oldest sitting in front. Kalau dulu..duh..berebut dedua nak dok depan and they will be jumping here and there.Oh they've grown up so fast..

Kami lapar lalu ke shopping complex. Ordered and ate. Then suddenly, Nia wiggled her body.

"Adik nak kench*** ke?"
(Nia angguk)
"Emm...." (Ucu tgh fikir kat mana toilet terdekat and samada nak bayar dulu or..and or...)

"Ucu...dah kench****"

There you have it...in the restaurant. Hambik kau dod, sape soh tak nak tanya awal2 nak gi tandas ke tak. Kelam kabut Ucu cari seluar baru and toilet..

The restaurant? Er...tips RM5 cukup tak?

Pee Incident 2
Saya pulang dari KL naik bas dua tingkat. Sempat gak dapat kenalan baru di dalam bas. Student gunting rambut kat Kampung Melayu. Menarik gak, boleh dapat rebonding murah ke. he he.

Ada interesting family duduk depan kitorang. Mereka berempat. Suami isteri dan anak perempuan 2 orang. After 2 hours in the bus, the daughter kecoh lalu turun. Aku suspect dia sure nak kench. But bila dia naik, dia dok marah-marah ayah dia..hmmm

The bus wont stop until reached Machap. But due to her special request, the bus will stop at Yong Peng. Tapi nak sampai Yong Peng ada lagi 20 minit. Hmmm...

Then the daughter exchanged sits with her father. The father sat with the mother...and jeng jeng jeng.... Bertuah tak anak-anak dia dok gelakkan dia.

Erm..dah tak tahan sangat pakcik tuh..terpaksa kench di dalam plastik di dalam bas. Tak lama lepas tuh bas tuh berhenti for loo break. Aku pun tak tahan gak...tapi alhamdulillah masih berjaya menahan hingga ketemu cik Jam.

Moral of the story: Be alert of cik jam dan wusolah each time you go anywhere or ride what ever..

SETEM

2009-08-07T10:49:00.003+08:00

Semalam, aku writer's block. Macam-macam nak tulis tapi end up aku delete semua perenggan. Tapi hari ini aku teruja sikit sebab malam tadi nonton wayang dengan sepupuku paling muda. Dua orang, sorang umur 14 tahun seorang lagi lapan tahun. Naper paling muda? Sebab mereka anak makcik ku paling bongsu dalam keluarga ayah yang ada 10 adik beradik. Erm, setakat nih tada plak dengar makcik or pakcik aku yang umur dah umur pencen ada anak kecik sekecil yang lapan tahun..so, lu pikirlah sendiri.

Nonton cerita SETEM. Hasil garapan Khabir Bhatia. Sebelum tuh nak btau faktor-faktor luaran yang mungkin boleh memberi efek terhadap komen aku tentang wayang nih. First, aku letih sebab semalam banyak betul agreement aku vet lalu jam 9pm dah mula menguap. Second, penat drive jauh tgk wayang sebab igtkan my beau nak ikut but end up dia tak rasa nak pegi sebab banyak keja. He should have told me earlier..sebab aku dah pusing ke arah rumah dia yang banyak traffic light dan banyak keta,lori dan bas serta motor.

Finally, the film. I know its from Khabir Bhatia so the sinematography shall be the same as Cinta and Sepi. (checked). Para pelakon yang hampir sama. (checked). However, the storyline...not as complicated as SEPI and CINTA, amat straightforward dan sangat santai menontonnya. Tapi mungkin disebabkan santai itu ditambah lawak yang aku just chuckle bukan ketawa terbahak-bahak, menyebabkan aku cepat bosan sebab saat-saat yang mendebarkan muncul lambat.(sila ambil kira faktor luaran di atas). Alhamdulillah untuk filem ini aku tak tengok langsung The making of dia mahupun trailer dia,and I bet if I did..surely aku bosan tahap dewa!!

Lawak dia adalah lawak kering yang banyak di dalam dialog dan bukan dengan mimik muka. Having sathiya in the picture brings colours in the film. Colours= multiracial film and also the jokes. Ada juga lawak dia yang tersirat. Like in this film ada pendatang haram indonesia yang terseret sekali dalam kancah permasalahan mereka sehingga ke akhir filem. (tak kena tangkap plak oleh pak polisi plak tuh) Still kelakar sebab he has this innocent look dan asik bertindak ikut arahan je.

Set aside all the illogical factor(biasalah pengarah suruh), it is still a fun movie to watch. Its a totally different way of story by Khabir. It still has the multi character in a film like SEPI and CINTA but the way Khabir connects each and every character within the film is just awesome because it is not that complicated to understand. Lawak dia bila dah separuh baru kelakar gila.

My kazen enjoyed so much, and I did too although Im tired. hehe. So, peeps, sokonglah filem Melayu.(watak orang cina pun cakap melayu kedah tau!). Bak kata Afdlin "Justin Timberlake". (saya selitkan efek surprise di sini untuk anda mengetahuinya dengan menonton filem ini).Ha ha.

..:: CaCaMaRBa::..

2009-08-03T12:08:00.001+08:00

Posting kali ini tiada unsur-unsur positive.

Saya penat, ngantuk, brain freeze dan tak mampu nak lihat butir-butir huruf di atas kertas mahupun di komputer. (kecuali huruf-huruf yang sedang saya taip).

Saya kelelahan kerana baru pulang dari lawatan kerja di Utara selama 3 hari 3 malam (termasuk perjalanan pergi dan pulang). Penat tido dalam bas. Seronok bershopping? Masih tidak puas kerana kerana masa yang diberikan adalah terlalu sedikit dan tidak puas untuk mencari sesuatu yang lain dari lain. Sementelah dek panggilan my beau yang sangat sukar untuk meletakkan telefon tatkala saya sedang sibuk mahu tawar-menawar, saya telah tersilap membeli barang, sepatutnya seluar alih2 dalam beg berisi skirt pula. Geram pada diri sendiri.

Kerja sangat menimbun apabila berada kawasan jajahan bekerja. Banyak report kena siapkan serta pelbagai dokumen perlu disemak. Terasa mahu cepatkan masa sehingga jam 1pm supaya boleh tido sebentar.

Natijahnya, saya minta half day hari ini untuk saya qada'kan tidur saya serta bersama-sama menemankan orang-orang putih di rumah saya. (sedara-mara dari Perancis datang menumpang tidur seramai 6 orang dan semua LELAKI).Eh, teman berjalan bukan teman tidur ye. Nauzubillah.

Positif vibe: Saya bersyukur selamat pergi dan pulang dari Utara. Bersyukur punya rezeki untuk membeli dan memberikan kepada mereka yang memesan. Bersyukur mempunyai bos yang baik hati kerana membenarkan saya half day. Bersyukur dan terus bersyukur.....

.:: Comedy Court: Res Ipsa Loquitor::..

2009-07-29T10:05:00.007+08:00

Mahu cerita..mahu cerita..especially at my office now is having some technical error due to energy electrical comsumption, in other words, BLACKOUT! Luckily my Unit provide me a huge lappy, but still I cant proceed with my work since the internet connection cant function. Di tambah lagi my Broadband dah lama tak bayar. Haha. Enuf bebelan.(Clearer version, copyright dari sweetlilly kitchen)(ambil gamba dalam gelap bercahayakan lampu henfon..hihi)

Let me indulge myself with my own story for the past few days. Its my beau's birthday yesterday, happy birthday darling and I am still confused with our status though. The night before his birthday, picked up his cupcake with him in Pasir Gudang, gave it to him and went home. Sudah niat untuk membeli, eventhough pernah hati kecil ini menghalang diri untuk tidak memberi. Cantikkan akak tuh buat cupcake motor. Oh..my beau loves the motor which reminds him of his old beloved motor,yang musnah sebab accident di Genting. Not bother to wait the magical strike 12am with him, terus pulang setelah mission accomplished or also not even bother to be the first one to wish his birthday via sms.

However, I had a blast on his birthday which was yesterday. For nearly 3 years in Jaybee..finally I got the chance to do something that I long to do that is WATCHING A LIVE THEATER! Betapa saya sangat sangat sangat suka live performance. Until now, I was still overwhelmed with the nite spent yesterday besides having him to accompany me. Its Comedy Court theater. Two Indians comedian impersonating 3 scenarios. The first one in a game show, "Who wants 2 B a Billionaire". Impersonating Jalaludin Hassan and a corrupted YB. Its cynical when it involve the issues on dirty politics, bribery yada yada..they truly made it so funny!

Second one, as typical two chinesemen having a good time together, with loud handphones and totally loud and lots of adult conversation. Haha. tersipu kema*uan aku gelak.

Last but not least, 2 typical Indian lawyers trying to help an indian cleaner who had an accident with a corky driver.It was funny when they draft the letter of demand while having booze in a club. Tapi end up, they were the corky drivers who hit that cleaner, so being lawyers of course they'll find the loopholes to avoid any litigation matters which actually towards them. It was all typical lawyers joke. I was laughing like mad. My beau instead, ada yg he couldnt get the joke so there are times when he asked me what the hell the joke was about, how cute. :)

All in all, Im loving it...the theater la of course.

.:: Just A Post::..

2009-07-27T03:51:00.002+08:00

A lot of things happen to the world today..

1) I have been receiving emails stating that there is a conspiracy on Michaels Jackson's death. Dan juga pembunuhan seorang wanita Islam benama Marwa di Jerman, ditikam di mahkamah ketika beliau ingin menuntut hak sebagai seorang wanita biasa yang beragama Islam.Is this Islamaphobia is getting worst or what? At the first place who the hell create and invent such words as Islamaphobia? Please google and tell me, ada tak Jewishphobia or Christianophobia or even Buddhaphobia? Heh. Kalau ada pun, sapa yang ngets sangat nak fobia terhadap mereka? Siapa yang berkuasa kat muka bumi Allah ini kalau bukan penciptanya? I believe those who are islamophobic, they are those who just envy the perfectness of Islam..konsep syumul kita, dari sebelum diciptakan Nabi Adam A.S sehingga kebangkitan Hari Akhirat. Indah dan lengkapnya Al-Quran. Keperibadian tinggi Rasulullah S.A.W serta sunnahnya.

Ya Allah, semoga mereka itu dibukakan hati untuk mengenali lebih dalam tentang Islam dan tidak mustahil akan menjadi antara mereka yang PALING KUAT mempertahankan Islam sebagaimana sahabat Rasulullah, Saidina Hamzah. (bukan kah doa itu senjata paling kuat Muslim?) Amin....

2) Takziah buat keluarga Allahyarhamah Yasmin bt Ahmad. Semoga rohnya dicucuri rahmatNya. Semoga tenang di sana... She suffered strok and had an operation due to the blood clot in her brain. It reminds me of the day when my dad had his first strok. Perasaan yang amat cemas,risau bercampur baur. Especially when the doctor reported that there is a blood clot in his brain. Stroke can happen to anybody now. I am a stroke-phobic (let me invent this word). Ada ayat amalan yang elok untuk diamalkan bagi mengelakkan serangan angin ahmar. Its better to start a healthy life right on. Its true, life is getting short...as in your age if you dont take good care of your consumption and also your stamina. Consumption=food, stamina= exercise. (Disclaimer: Bila-bila Allah boleh tarik nyawa kita waima dengan hanya sebutir batu dari langit) Oleh itu, besides taking good care of your health, please take the best care of your amalan especially yang wajib, kerana hanya itu yang akan kita bawa bersama bila kita sudah menutup mata untuk selama-lamanya kelak.

..::Apakah?::..

2009-07-22T21:05:00.003+08:00

Ada sesuatu yang mengganggu hidup saya hari ini. Tentang penggunaan telefon. Sekarang ni dah ramai yang pakai telefon bimbit kan. Tak ramai yang pakai telefon rumah yang mana kita ketidak ketahuan siapa yang mengangkat atau siapa yang menelefon. So, kalau telefon bimbit, rasanya tiada yang berkongsi penggunaannya. Oleh itu, kita pasti tahu siapa yang memanggil dan dipanggil,(disclaimer: bergantung pada keadaan). Tapi pada tika dan saat ini, berikut merupakan situasi yang sedang saya alami.

Sesiapa yang mengangkat telefon bimbit seseorang yang bukan telefon sendiri, tolong lah jangan tanya soalan seperti di bawah:

1) Nak cakap dengan siapa?
(erkk..of course nak cakap dengan empunya cellphone kan?)

2) Siapa ni?
(Exception if tercatat "No Number" disitu atau penggunaan nombor yang tidak disimpan di dalam telefon empunya. TAPI KALAU DAH SAVE SURELY ANDA TAHU SAPE YANG CAKAP KAN??)

Sila jangan tanya lagi soalan sekiranya si pemanggil menjawab:

"Saya nih kawan dia. "
(erm..mungkin jawapan yang sangat general, tapi perlukah menjawab dengan lebih detail seperti, kawan yang baru jumpa tiga bulan, atau kawan sekolah yang sama-sama main motor, atau kawan sekerja di McDonald atau lain-lain lah)

Instead, sila tanya soklan atau ayat yang berunsur sebegini :

Terus angkat dan jawab, "Maaf, empunya telefon tidak dapat jawab panggilan anda, dia ke....... (sila nyatakan alasan), saya ni...(sila nyatakan siapakah yang mengangkat), ada apa-apa pesanan? Nanti saya sampaikan atau call balik dalam........ (sila nyatakan approx masa dia akan pegang telefon dia sendiri)" Sejuk hati diri si pemanggil dengar tau.

Oh, saya sungguh terganggu tika dan saat ini.

..:: Birthday ::..

2009-07-22T01:27:00.001+08:00

Sudah lewat malam. Still cant sleep after 2 caps of ubat batuk (malas nak guna sudu,guna tutup botol dia je.heh) Went to Mardzia's house to celebrate her bufday. Simple one. Biasa lah ada kek. Lit the candle. Makan-makan. I was on medical leave so thought of baking macaroni. Due to kemalasan nak keluar beli barang, I just goreng my trademark food. Mihun putih. Even my aunty said that it is, "Mee Didi". Ok lah tuh daripada aku pegi beli mihun goreng kat Eden, Restoran Sukhotai suggested by him yang harga dia boleh buat jamuan 100 orang. Elin bawak sate, chicken wing (requested bybufday gurl) and Karipap. Am bawak kek. Sedap. Cuma aku leh makan kek n my mihun je. Sedang mengurangkan pemakanan haiwan yang berdarah.

Im sick. Tapi bila dah berkumpul..hilang rasa demam. Tapi balik rumah, demam balik. Haishh. Totally not fit to work tomorrow. Saya sensitive pada aircond serta tidak mahu menjangkiti virus kepada rakan sekerja.

Oh ya..we have a new born lil angel!! Lil Alysha sudah lahir pada 1110 on the same date as Mardzia. Congrats Ana and Lovejeet. Semoga Alysha menjadi seorang anak yang baik dan membesar bagai johan! Er..and as beautiful as Cik Mardzia nyer..*wink. Jangan ikut perangai laser mazia dah ler. hikhik.

..:: Hacummmmmmmmmmm::.

2009-07-20T14:49:00.002+08:00

Sneezing...hacummm. It was spring clean weekend yesterday. Dah berminggu janji dengan my aunty to clean and organized the house but always in vain due to my tight schedule with my work, immediate family and friends. Killing two birds actually, one for preparing the arrival of the legal owner of the house (ie my cousin whom my aunty sold the house to her. She is currently stays in France) and secondly, for the first phase cleaning for Hari raya lah what else.

The dusk..masya allah tebalnya especially the room at the back because we seldom occupied the room and apatah lagi nak kemas beria. Well, this post may sound like we are Pem*****, but we cant help it...both of us have lots of commitments sehingga menyebabkan rumah kurang dikemas. My aunty sibuk dengan urusan kedainya.. me? biasalah outstation. We used to have a bibik but she decided to quit after she had a loooooong vacation.

Kemas rumah sehingga diri sendiri dijangkiti kuman. Plus factor yang menyumbang kepada unsur tiada imunisasi dalam diri ialah, akibat pulang lewat setelah berlibur di town 2 malam berturut-turut. First night, with Mardzia and beau... 2nd night bermain boling, menyibuk di tournament officemate my beau. Sucks la main boling. Sesungguhnya saya suka main taram je baling bola tuh, akibatnya menjadi pencuci longkang paling banyak. Sayang tade anugerah tuh. cess kalau tak sure aku menang.

Natijah aktiviti di atas, saya kini demam, selsema dan batuk. Bukan H1N1 ye. Nauzubillah.minta dijauhkan

..:: Friday ::..

2009-07-17T15:01:00.003+08:00

I love Friday. Hari yang hampir dengan hujung minggu. Hari kebesaran umat Islam. Setiap pagi Jumaat pasti ada slot membudayakan Al-quran serta makan-makan di pejabat. This is the time for me and my other officemates to gather and had our own gossips and hot news. Kalau tak, just hai and bye bila di dalam satu pejabat. Hari yang waktu rehat tengah hari yang panjang.
My good male friend, saudara nixk, sering dengki bila lihat kaum wanita diberikan nikmat rehat tengah hari pada hari Jumaat yang panjang, dan kelihatan bersenang lenang bershopping. Saya selalu menerima sms dengki nya tiap kali hari Jumaat. Jangan lah dengki nixk, silalah nikmati nikmat pahala yang anda terima tatkala ke masjid mendengar khutbah dengan hati yang ikhlas. Nak tambahkan lagi ukhwah dan kebaikan? sampai-sampaikanlah pesanan yang anda dengar ketika khutbah Jumaat kepada wanita2 yang tidak berkesempatan mendengarnya.(sebab sibuk bershopping.he he he).

Today is not just a routine Friday. Its my lil khalifah's 5th Birthday!!. My big, handsome and smart nephew..ADAM KHALIS BIN KHAIRIL FAIZI NOOR!! dah besar dah dia. Being the first grandson in the family..of course has a really special place in each of our hearts.

Dear Adam,

I still remember when I first saw you in the hospital. The day you were born. So tiny yet perfect in my eyes. As you grew, the one special thing about you is your smile and your laughter. That cheeky smile and pretentious laughter (yes..ucu tahu adam suka buat-buat ketawa walaupun tak la kelakar sangat sebab adam saja nak ambil hati orang yang cuba buat kelakar) terlalu capture lots of hearts.

You are a fast learner, a really obedient boy walaupun kadang-kadang selalu tantrum bila kehendak anda tidak dipenuhi. It is easy to teach you new things.. you always remember and makes us surprise.

You are 5 years old now..a big brother to your little sister. Ucu prays that as you grow older, you will be someone that will inspires all especially your sister with your intelligence, kindness, genuine and all the positive vibe in you..

I love you so much and even though I always be strictest makcik u ever had, believe me, you will love me for that....Happy 5th years old darling...

Love,
Ucu

..:: Izinkan aku ketik::.

2009-07-13T08:42:00.001+08:00

Its been 2 months. Yerp. Boleh dikatakan menghilangkan diri. Hanya di alam maya. Saya kerap bermesyuarat di Kuala Lumpur. Berkursus di luar KL dan JB dan ada juga meeting di Sabah. Seronok? Partly. I am enjoying my moments working in JB to bits. Ya, sila muntah.

Not going to pour all my 2 months activities. Will write later-later. I just wanna post about my weekend.Precisely 11-12 July 2009. Awesome. Kerna pada saya, saya berjaya meluangkan masa bersama orang yang saya sayang di sekeliling saya. Setelah berminggu asyik terkejar sana-sini. Sehingga saya rasa sudah tentu ada yang terdetik bahawa saya terlalu sibuk dan pasti sudah lupa pada diri mereka. Oh, sila jangan beranggapan begitu. Sedih saya.

Hmm. walaupun hanya semalam, berjaya juga pulang ke Muar. Having myself in Muar, its a "wajib" to divide myself into two ie, to spend time with Ayah and also to help Mak with her kuih. Alhamdulillah sempat bawak ayah jalan2 dan belikan cermin mata berkualiti untuknya serta menemaninya gunting rambut. Dia pasti terubat kesunyiannya apabila dengar celoteh pokcik gunting rambut tuh. Mak pula, saya bawakkan udang galah dari Sabah yang siap di masak dari JB, dan dapat juga bantu 3 dulang menggentel batang buruk. :)

Pulang dari Muar agak lewat, but knowing that on Sunday I had to attend kenduri at Mak Som's house, I realise that my beau surely waits for me to confirm our outing. We had a night cruise around JB. Both of us had a really sucks day last Friday so we try not to bring up those incidents to ruin our night out. Walaupun tidak berhenti minum mamak or wayang or lepak tgk gig or what not. Hanya cruise.. :)

On Sunday Mak Som buat kenduri. Attend her kenduri. Dari jam 11hingga jam 6pm. Seronok. Sebab jumpa semua sepupu dan makcik2. Layan budak2 kecik. Tolang-tolong apa2 yang patut. Ajak Mak Esah sekali. Hmm saya pernah terbaca, its good to be with someone older, aged 60 years and above and also younger aged 3 years and below...so that you may learn to appreciate your life more. Anda kurang faham? Fikirlah sendiri.

Lastly, spending time at home. Kemas-kemas apa yang patut. Bilik sendiri pun ada perasaan bila kita lama tak kemas dia. Little isha and Farihin is at my house, so notty yet so CUTE. Haishhh.

2009-07-10T04:46:00.001+08:00

Testing testing

..:: Thistle Port Dickson::..

2009-07-05T22:25:00.000+08:00

Telah menghadiri kursus IP di Port Dickson. Fun. First night mcm bosan thinking that I was the only rep from my organisation. Im lucky to meet two fun people sitting besides me on the first day of class. Both from Biotech, Isz and Elina. Kursus? Biasalah..you learn new things. After kursus? Its huya huyeh! Hehe. Three of us went to Tanjung Tuan Light house. Ive been there before after my final exams masa zaman LLB(Hons). The trek has been upgraded. Syabas.

Its tiring yet fascinating day...mau tak penat kena panjat balik bukit untuk balik. Ill let the piccies tell the story ok....entoire!

..:: Results::..

2009-06-15T21:59:00.000+08:00

Alhamdulillah. Saya telah mendapat tawaran sambung belajar. Beserta biasiswa penuh. Selesai belajar,insya allah menjadi pendidik di salah satu IPTA. Sukar nak membuat keputusan sebenarnya. Istikharah sudah. Hati masih gundah gulana kerana masih belum memulakan langkah pertama iaitu, mengisi mana-mana borang sambung belajar. Tiada masa? Banyak tapi telah dibazirkan. Tsk.Tsk. My bad habit. Semoga dijauhkan.

2009-05-14T14:47:00.003+08:00

..:: Mother's Day?::..

Harap maklum, Im gonna celebrate My Mak-Ayah's Day this weekend. The weekend which was supposed to be my Perhentian getaway. Tak kisah lah hari apa pun kan? Seronok gak kita sambut hari yang lain dari orang.

..:: Konsert Awan Biru 090509 ::..

For the first time in 15 years, I went to a rockstar concert, SEARCH!! Pewwwwiittttt... (I realise he only pewits once in the concert, mungkin itu bukan trademark SEARCH tapi AMY, lalu dia tidak exposekan trademark dia sendiri). Its a standing concert. Amat tak selesa due to the smoke, B.O and also when the fanatic fans sang their hearts out. (Hello..aku nak dengar Amy nyanyi bukan korang!) Oh well, orang dah belanja kita terimalah kat mana pun tiket tuh berada. We (kak fiza n I) were lucky that we have our unofficial bodyguards. They really protect us. Alhamdulillah tiada insiden gesel-gesel dan raba-raba.Thanks a lot pada Encik yang belanja kami..you rawkk!!

..:: Huge Chocolate::..

"Wouldn't it be nice if we were older
Then we wouldn't have to wait so long
And wouldn't it be nice to live together
In the kind of world where we belong" ~~Cadbury Theme Song

This post is just for my record. Malam semalam seorang member yang baik hati telah memajukan satu kilo coklat kat aku. Besor tuh..Sadly, it was not my favourite. Id prefer Dark Chocolate, u can feel the bitterness of cocoa melting in your mouth..urmm.. So aku telah membahagi-bahagikan kepada rakan seofis. Seronok lihat mereka indulge the chocolate. I admit Im craving for chocolate last nite and alhamdulillah someone fulfill my needs..namun disebabkan bukan dark chocolate, my crave terbantut. Lalu, aku ke Giant membeli BLACK BITTER CHOCOLATE from Beryl's. Janji Dark chocolate..he he he. (WAHAI KEKANDAKU YANG BAKAL PULANG KE TANAHAIR..SILA LAH BELI IMPORTED DARK COKLAT UNTUK ADINDAMU YANG TITOS INI)

2009-05-07T10:43:00.003+08:00

..:: Rajuk dan Pujuk::..

Selamat dah sampai dari Terengganu. Niat di hati mahu shop till I drop tetapi poket belum penuh. Memang gaji dah dapat tapi ada beberapa hari lagi untuk survive. Start bulan depan dah nak kena bayar ASB. Hmm My heartiest thanks for the warmest hospitality from Farah's and Kak su's family. Sungguh saya seronok duduk di sana.

Lawatan di Terengganu kali ini amat berbeza dari yang sebelumnya. I have my own time to do anything that I want with the assistance of Far's Myvi. Lalu saya pun bershopping di Pasar Payang. Pabila tengah hari menjengah, ibu telepon mengingatkan saya tentang biras ku di Batu Buruk yang sakit. Hmm since Ive done with my shopping, I called her brother to know the address. Tak sempat nak jumpa Hazri and Wahida.

My brother in law's elder sister (Kak N) sakit stroke and paralyze half of her body. Dahulu koma sebab blood clot di kepala sehingga kena operation. Still young, 35+ and was a lawyer.. Alhamdulillah bila gi jenguk dia,dia dah boleh berjalan sendiri dengan bantuan tongkat, her memories pun sikit2 dah mula ingat. Dapat ajak mereka sekeluarga berjalan-jalan di sekitar Kuala Terengganu. They dont have a car so amat jarang untuk Kak N keluar rumah jalan-jalan.

If you put yourself in her shoes boring tau jadi orang sakit, u have to wait for other people's time and effort to ask you out tak kisahlah hanya berjalan-jalan di tempat sendiri..itu yang jadi depress kalau tiada sapa yang layan. So, masa kita sihat ni, mari sama-sama bantu yang sakit dan kurang upaya sebab masa kita belum tahu lagi bagaimana orang akan layan kita.
Me and my brother in law's siblings..
Me and Kak Su. Harap maklum dia sudah punya 2 anak dan ketika itu baru penat pulang dari meniaga di Pasar Payang. Doesnt she just look gorgeous?

2009-04-30T13:38:00.002+08:00

..:: Another Commitment::..

Alhamdulillah my loan for ASB succeed. Thanks to a new friend, he helped me a lot throughout the loan approval. I already know that Im a high commitment bearer and I was just giving a try to apply for the ASB loan. My niat was not for myself, but for my family. Had a hard time to choose which bank and alhamdulilah with His guide, I found a new friend and helped me so much and taught me a lot of new things too *giggle

Although the amount is lesser than what has been applied, but at least I manage to get through the approval process. Well, there goes my car loan. Kengkadang terasa mahu ke AKPK to seek advise in terms of my financial situation. No, im not bankrupt and I dont exceed any of my credit cards. But for precaution kerna malang tidak berbau. Kalau berbau pasti masam sahaja...

Ganu Kita

Frankly, it was such a depressing feeling when each time the word "perhentian" came accross my mind. Yes. Pulau Perhentian is suppose to be MY GETAWAY. I had always had the feeling to go there regardless any probs tapi ye lah when the probs came one by one which delaying my trip there..it makes me depressed. Termasuklah apabila ditakutkan oleh Tuan majistret kita di Sarawak nuuuun kalau pergi bersendirian.Tapi ye lah..kalau ikutkan hati..mati. My bad habit for being selfish. No offence ye kengkawan I dont blame anyone, I just blame myself kerana terlalu carried away with this Perhentian thing.

Dan alhamdulillah, Allah makbulkan impian saya, memanglah bukan ke Perhentian tapi ke Terengganu la jugak. Paling enak ditanggung oleh organisasi kerana perginya saya ke sana atas urusan kerja. Its a blessing..kerna saya boleh bunuh 2 burung dengan satu batu. Kerja dan Holiday serta shopping dengan relax. Eh, itu sudah 3 burung? Hikhik. Ok lah tuh kerana saya sudah sangap berada di opis..perlu fresh air..

Seronoknya.....!!

2009-04-28T17:10:00.002+08:00

..:: Jentayu::..

Di paruhmu kemilauan sinar
Menyepuhi sejuta rasa
Kemulian di hatimu
Bening budi terdampar di jagat raya

Di sayap taufan kau jelajahi
Awan gemawan membawa rindu
Kasihmu menentangi kezaliman
Ketidakadilan

( korus )
Jentayu
Patah sayap bertongkat paruh
Jentayu
Patah paruh bertongkat siku
Jentayu
Patah siku bertongkat dagu
Jentayu
Patah dagu bertongkat kuku

Pinjamkanlah hatimu
Untuk semua

2009-04-23T08:39:00.002+08:00

.:: Inspired::..

I heard over the radio yesterday morning, topiknya ialah : Adakah perlu membeli handphone canggih yang mahal? sumthing like that lah. Ada this akak jawab tak perlu sebab dari kita beli henfon yang mahal baik kita simpan duit tuh buat tabungan.

Hmm tabungan. Just went to MSAM yesterday. I wonder whether people who went there gain anything from the exhibition? What if there's no eperaduan, just a plain exhibition with no prizes to be won? Will they manage to hit millions of crowd? I observe that whenever there's any big exhibition or expos or what not, surely they'll have free goodies walaupun hanya sebatang pen. What if plain boring exhibition?

Oh saya bukan mahu menjadi seorang yang hipokrit, saya juga suka pada benda-benda free. Tapi apa yang penting...(kerjasama?) pada saya ialah apa yang terkandung di dalam pameran tersebut. All about tabungan and the income you can get every year. All the information that you may not get from the internet. I know there are rumours saying that this kind of saving is haram. I dare not to comment further.

I quote Warren Buffett's advice for 2009 with regard to saving, " Don't save what is left after spending. Spend what is left after saving."A good one.

It reminds me of two person in my life as I grow up. One who is not a professional, just kerani sehingga pencen. But somehow, manage to go for Haj at early age, have her own 2 cars, 2 houses and a few properties. Bahagia sungguh dia bila sudah pencen, duit dapat, anak-anak dah besar dan bekerja dan yang paling penting, she has no debt during her retirement days..

Another one, a professional, an academician until retired. Until now, she hasn't perform her haj (belum waktunya kot..), still renting a house, the kancil she bought still have few years to go and I heard that she wanted to change into another car. (which for me more debt in a few years).

I hope I can learn from their lesson, its my option to choose which path I want to go. Either to live in a wealthy life during your early age and suffers through out your older days or vice versa. Or to have a good life financially from early age until you die.. Benda ni semua subjektif, Allah yang tentukan tapi apa-apa pun usaha nya datang dari kita sendiri. All in all the magic word here is all about SAVING... Lu pikir la sendiri...